7 Reasons

Category: Other Posts

  • Russian Roulette Sunday: A Picture and a Horse With No Trailer

    Russian Roulette Sunday: A Picture and a Horse With No Trailer

    Hi there! It’s Russian Roulette Sunday again and we distinctly remember expressing the hope last week that our new trailer would be ready today.  This was foolish.  Experience should have taught us that there would be some sort of technical cock-up and there has been, delaying the final pieces of filming by about a week.  Some of the artwork has arrived though, so feel free to enjoy that instead.

    In other news, we need to issue an apology to anyone that tried to visit our website between 00:30 and 02:20 on Friday morning.  A redirection plugin that we were using on one of the sub-pages malfunctioned and turned our website into a horse.  This horse:

    As a consequence of the malfunction, anyone attempting to access any part of 7Reasons.org  was automatically redirected to a full-screen version of this picture, so if you were one of the people affected, we apologise for any distress that this error caused.  We fully appreciate just how terrifying the appearance of the surprise-horse was.  In fact, one of us (we will preserve his anonymity) shrieked and fell from his chair while recoiling from it, possibly startling some whippets and racing-pigeons.  Rumours that he exclaimed, “by eck!” are unsubstantiated.

    We have decided to call him Alan The Scary Horse. We tried out many other names while we were feverishly trying to wrest control of our site from his evil clutches, and the one that we’ve settled on seems positively printable in comparison to them.

     

    7 Reasons – horse permitting – will return tomorrow.

  • Russian Roulette Sunday: 7 Reasons: The Trailer: The Trailer

    Russian Roulette Sunday: 7 Reasons: The Trailer: The Trailer

    The Russian Roulette Sunday Logo

    It’s Russian Roulette Sunday again and once more the saga of advertising our website rears its head.  We currently have a trailer – rather catchily entitled 7 Reasons: The Trailer – under construction.  We promised it to you several weeks ago, and it still isn’t ready yet.  It’s been a nightmare saga of broken computers, missing cameras, temperamental hairdryers and complications with rendering and frame rates so dull that overhearing talk of them would kill a casual listener stone dead; the making of Fitzcarraldo was probably less problematic.  But progress is being made, and now we are at the stage where we can present 7 Reasons: The Trailer: The Trailer.  This, we firmly believe, is progress, and so certain are we that the completion of 7 Reasons: The Trailer is within sight that we’re prepared to state – confidently – that it will be ready soon (ish).

    7 Reasons: The Trailer: The Trailer

  • 7 Reasons That The World Cup Final Was A Disappointment

    7 Reasons That The World Cup Final Was A Disappointment

    The World Cup final.  Perhaps the ultimate sporting event.  It was such a let down though.  Can we have Sunday night back?

     

    7 Reasons That The World Cup Final Was A Disappointment

  • Russian Roulette Sunday: There Is No Such Thing As A Psychic Octopus

    Russian Roulette Sunday: There Is No Such Thing As A Psychic Octopus

    Russian Roulette SundayWhat is it about the name Paul? Half the world becomes convinced that an octopus is psychic and half of Paul Gascoigne thinks that a murderer wants to do a spot of fishing. Rather worryingly, that was his sane half. We need to return to normality and thankfully this is where I step in. For all of you who have been taken in by Paul the Octopus, you need to watch this. He’s not psychic. He’s a chancer. Just like me.

     

    There Is No Such Thing As A Psychic Octopus

  • Russian Roulette Sunday: World Cup Separated at Birth

    Russian Roulette Sunday: World Cup Separated at Birth

    It’s Sunday again and, now that the World Cup has reached the semi-final stage, there’s no football today.  So, what better way to spend our time than thinking about football?  Not making predictions, obviously, our track record there is worse than…well…anything.  We predicted that England would beat Germany handsomely and yesterday, half of the 7 Reasons team confidently stated that the German defence would be no match for this man.

    Lionel Messi in an Argentina shirt on the cover of a Roger Hargreaves Mr Man book (Mr Men)So, today we won’t be speculating on anything that might happen in the semis or the final.  We’re shying away from conjecture and sticking to observation.  Here are some World Cup doppelgangers that we’ve spotted during the tournament so far.

    Lionel Messi and Roman Polanski look alike

    Gordon Kaye and Vicente Del Bosque look alike

    Carlos Puyol and Lee Curreri Look Alike

    Wayne Rooney and Cameron Diaz look alikeEngland and France look alike

    Do you look like anyone that’s played a part in World Cup 2010?  If so, get in touch and send us pictures, we might add you to this page.  Unless, of course, you look like Carlos Tevez.  We don’t want nightmares.

  • Russian Roulette Sunday: The A to Z of 7 Reasons (part II)

    Well, it’s Sunday again, and the thing that we were hoping to bring you has been put back due to our website difficulties this week.  So here’s the thing that was going to appear next week: Part II of the A-Z of 7 Reasons.  Last week remains unaffected.

    N is for No.  Which is the answer to the question, is writing 7 Reasons every other day ever a chore? Some days it’s difficult; you don’t feel funny, or you’re ill, or you’re busy trying to do something else, or you’re tired, but it’s always an enjoyable thing to do.  If it wasn’t, we wouldn’t do it.  And you wouldn’t read it.  Which you are doing.  Right now.  Hello!

    O is for October. It was in this month in the year of 2009 that 7 Reasons was born. In years to come people will remember this time. Probably because we’ll keep reminding them. So thinking logically, it would help if you just made a note and sent us beer in October. Thanks.

    P is for Penguin.

    At 7 Reasons have a psychedelic penguin.  He doesn’t have a name.  And he sometimes turns up when you least expect him.  Or, in the case of next Sunday, when you most expect him.  What could possibly make anyone happier than a psychedelic penguin?

    Q is for Quinn. Or, to use her correct name, Claire Elizabeth Quinn. This is who actually comes up with all the posts for the Kent side of the sofa. And probably explains the display cushions.

    R is for Rohan.  Purveyor of the Pilkington hat: The official hat of 7 Reasons.

    A Rohan ad,advert,advertisment for the Pilkington Hat.

    S is for Sofa. Half of it is in Yorkshire, half of it has just moved from London to somewhere in Kent. Though quite where in Kent the sofa isn’t sure. A bit like its owner.

    T is for T’internet.  Which is what the internet is known as in Yorkshire.  We don’t have to prefix web addresses with a t though, that would be wasteful. And that sort of profligacy is frowned upon in Yorkshire, where men are men and women read this:

    The cover of the womens lifestyle magazine, Yorkshire Wife

    U is for Ubiquitous. 7 Reasons is everywhere. It’s in everything and on anything. A bit like air. Everywhere you look there are 7 Reasons. For example: I am looking at the screen of my Mac at the moment. Immediately I can think of 7 Reasons why I am writing this at 10.30pm on a Saturday. And none of them are pretty.

    V is for Vuvuzela.  Vuvuzelas are eroding our brains.  We don’t know why, but we have a hunch that they are.  Am I the only one that can still hear them when the football stops?

    W is for Words. These are the tools of our trade. Without them we’d be very boring, but far better at spelling them.  Expert, in fact.

    X is for Xylophone.  We’ve never mentioned one.  Until now.

    Y is for Yes.  Which is the answer to the question, did you find coming up with something for X really difficult?

    Z is for Zebedee.  The biblical character that caused half of the 7 Reasons team to have such an uncontrollable and sustained fit of hysterical laughter that he was eventually sent from his R.E. lesson to a considerably less amusing interview with his headmaster.  To this day, he still can’t see or hear the name Zebedee without being amused.  The next time you see a member of the 7 Reasons team, say “Zebedee”.  At least one of them will laugh.  A lot.

  • 7 Reasons John McEnroe Can Not Be Serious (About His Hair)

    7 Reasons John McEnroe Can Not Be Serious (About His Hair)

    With the opening credits of BBC’s 2010 Wimbledon coverage came joy, happiness, extortionately priced strawberries and the horror of John McEnroe’s new hair. I say new hair, it’s probably quite old hair, but it does look different. And not for the better. Here are 7 Reasons – in a nicely packaged video format (just to show I can’t be outdone) – that explain why Mr John McEnroe should not have been tempted to rid the old look.

    7 Reasons John McEnroe Can Not Be Serious (About His Hair)

  • 7 Reasons To Love French Football

    7 Reasons To Love French Football

    Sometimes, words are not enough.  But that’s okay, we can always fall back on music and pictures.

    7 Reasons To Love French Football