Tag: LOVE

Guest Post: 7 Reasons To Love The British Monarchy

As the catalyst for much social discussion, the subject of countless headlines and even the inspiration behind many protests, it’s difficult to argue that the Royal Family aren’t a conversation starter. Despite dividing the opinions of the public on occasion, there are seven very special reasons why you can’t help but love the British monarchy.

1. Without the Royals, there would be no Pippa. In April 2011, the world was caught up in a whirlwind of fairy tale romance, bunting and street parties – it was time for the much-anticipated Royal wedding. Whether you loved it or loathed it, the inescapable pomp presented something to the general public other than misty-eyed monarchs; Pippa Middleton’s posterior. The bridesmaid’s bottom quickly gathered a following of over 225,000 fan on Facebook, and suddenly gave the Great British public a renewed interest in the Royals.

2. Banking on a bank holiday. Each time that we are faced with an up and coming event involving the monarchy, almost all of us ask ourselves the same question; will we get an extra bank holiday out of this? Some of us may even and plan our much awaited long weekends around the schedules of the Royal Family. Whether it’s a jubilee or a wedding, you’re likely to find that every Brit can discard their stiff upper lip regarding the Royals in lieu of an extra day away from their desk.

3. Rock star royalty. You might not expect a member of the monarchy to be prancing around a Las Vegas pool table crudely cupping their privates in a farcical attempt at modesty, but luckily for us that’s when it’s Prince Harry’s time to shine. Providing a little comic relief to the stiff regiment that is the Royal Family, Harry’s antics have ranged from poorly advised and politically incorrect fancy dress costumes to reported recreational drug use. Living a lifestyle that even the most well-seasoned rock star would shy away from makes the Royals seem a little more human; after all, wouldn’t we all do the same if we were born into a world of fame and fortune?

4. Bringing Britain the bacon. It’s difficult to walk a few yards in London without being confronted with an array of keyrings, coffee mugs and keepsakes emblazed with the faces of the Royal family. The monarchy attracts attention from people all over the world which in turn increases the amount of revenue generated by tourism each year. The year ending March 2013 saw overseas tourists spend £19 billion in the UK, and the monarchy is a contributing factor to this staggering figure. As one of the few remaining countries to still uphold a monarchy, we have to be grateful. After all, hoards of cash-burning visitors wouldn’t stand in the howling wind and drizzle for just anybody!

5. Prince Phillips’s classic clangers. Long before Prince Harry, Prince Phillip was dropping countless clangers during his duties, some of which were so outrageous they verged on the unbelievable. For example, just earlier this year during a trip to Luton and Dunstable University Hospital, the Prince remarked to a Filipino nurse “the Philippines must be half empty – you’re all here running the NHS”. Other toe-curling off the cuff comments include telling a robed president of Nigeria “you look like you’re ready for bed”. Even at 91, Phillip’s wit shows no sign of waning, so there may still be more mortifying moments to come.

6. Make way for the Magna Carta. If you think that Prince Harry’s partying and collection of pretty young things was going mad with power, you haven’t seen anything yet. King Henry I implemented a levy known as “scutage” that was payable by knights who wished to exempt themselves from their fighting duties during his rule in 1100. However, the King soon saw the potential to make a pretty penny from this tax, and increased the fee by 300%. It is said that this outbreak of craziness later inspired the creation of the Magna Carta to carefully control the powers of the ruling monarch.

7. Britain comes together. We may not know the words to the national anthem or be able to name each and every member, but the Royal Family does bring a certain level of unity to the UK. For example, when it was announced that Kate Middleton had gone into labour to give birth to Prince George Alexander Louis, over 6 million comments mentioning the imminent arrival were posted on Twitter within a 48 hour period. Along with a cup of tea and a buttered crumpet, the monarchy represents something that is quintessentially British that we can all share, whether we’re waving flags or just wishing it would all quieten down.

Author bio: Rosie Percy is a freelance writer who explores a diverse variety of lifestyle and human interest topics. She has previously written for the Guardian and a host of sites across the web, sharing her insights via blogs. Rosie currently lives in Brighton and spends her spare time seeing friends and strolling along the seafront.

July 26, 2013
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why The Brits Are Uptight About Sex

1. The Conservative Party. The Conservative party specialise in a particular duality; Tories like very much to keep things business and respectable at the front, but murky, duplicitous and even sinister at the back. When I say ‘back’, I mean of course that hidden away room in the tower out on the west wing of their country pile in the depths of Surrey where they keep the, er, apparatus. This dual existence means that, instead of embracing their sexual tastes as part of their identity as they should, they prefer to hide them away and keep them under lock and key and then present this as some sort of honest virtue. What a crock.

2. The Victorians. Perhaps the definitive age in British sexual mores, the Victorians have a lot to answer for. The Victorians had a tendency to tie up and repress the bosom of their emotions in a corset or a strait-jacket and take away its air, suffocating it, starving it. Their bedrooms cold and draughty, their beds stone slabs when compared to the kind of things on offer for bedrooms today.

Of course the figurehead for this smothering of desire was the Queen herself, all jutting chin and jowel and brimming with disdain for any show of open affection: a real ice Queen. Imagine her now, faced with the flesh-fest on Geordie Shore. She’d cancel Christmas and cut off supply routes to the north-east in an instant.

3. Female Suppression. For so long in Britain, the prevailing cultures – political, social and sexual – were patriarchal. You might well argue that this is still the case. The idea of discussing female sexual desires and needs was anathema; it was all one way stuff, if you excuse the image. That whole concept is based on male control and male control is predicated on holding stuff back in case things start slipping out of their hands. Again, you’ll have to excuse the image there. Sorry.

4. Stiff Upper Lip. Brits love to be seen as old warhorses; stoic in the face of unremitting adversity; taking every blow on the chin but never giving in, always soldiering on. The old stiff upper lip. If only they’d be a bit happier about keeping something else stiff? This piffley-idea of sanctified stoicism is laughable when you think of it. It’s like the Brits have seen Sisyphus and thought what a good idea his lot in life looked like.

5. The French. Brits are terrified of the French, how they smoulder, casually turn on and turn off their passion switches, how they can make even the most trivial of actions look effortlessly cool. More than anything else they are terrified of the French having sex. And being better at it than the Brits. The Brits think that if they pretend it (ie sex with the French) doesn’t exist, then the French cannot be better at it than us. It’s an ostrich shoving their head in the ground scenario. The French know their heads are better used elsewhere. Haw, hee, and indeed, haw.

6. Class. As a nation, the Brits are utterly obsessed with class. It defines every social occasion, every coming together on public transport, every purchase they make, every personal affect. Sex of course should and does transcend any pseudo-idea of class but the Brits being the Brits think that certain sexual habits are only to be associated with the underclass whereas everyone uses a variety of vegetables as part of their sexual role-play games don’t they? Don’t they? No? Oh.

7. Eros: not just a waiter. The name ‘Eros’ to a Brit is more likely to be associated with the waiter who brought them cheap plonk in that holiday complex down on the Costa del Torquay, not the God of Love. Cupid rhymes with stupid as they see it – the Brits will always find a way to undercut, downplay and not face up to the force of true sexual emotion when they should just let everything go, open their arms wide and embrace Eros to their hearts. Even if he is a bewhiskered, doddery old fella with breath that smells of cigarettes and dried shrimp. Especially, then.

June 22, 2013
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why It’s Good To Celebrate

We love a good old knees up in the UK – and we do it all year round. From Christmas parties and birthdays to special celebrations and family gatherings, having fun is something we’re good at.

According to the recently published Infographic The Cost Of Celebrations, from Baines & Ernst, there are four special dates that stick out on the calendar as some of the most popular occasions we love to celebrate – Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Easter and Father’s Day.

Here are our 7 Reasons why it’s good to celebrate these special occasions…

1. Everyone loves getting a card. Whether you’re giving or receiving, cards are pretty great. With just a few words, you can deliver the sentiment with maximum effect. Make someone laugh or shed a happy tear, a card can help you say so much without making a hugely expensive gesture.

In the UK we send 25 million Valentine’s cards, 30 million Mother’s Day cards and 7 million Father’s Day cards – which just goes to show how popular this tradition is.

2. Treats, treats and more treats… Apart from birthdays and Christmas, there are few occasions where you get spoilt rotten… unless you’re hopelessly in love or are a parent; then of course you get showered with gifts! And if you don’t have someone to treat you on Valentine’s or a child to give you a gift, at least you know you’ll be able to gorge on Chocolate at Easter.

3. Feel the love! Feeling amorous and totally loved up? Then Valentine’s Day offers the perfect opportunity to show the value of your love. On average, men in the UK spend £97.12 on their other halves, while women spend £91.89. And if you don’t have that ‘special someone’, then you could lavish your pet instead… you wouldn’t be alone, apparently 3% of pet owners give their pets a gift on February 14th.

4. Celebrate how fantastic your folks are. Parents are awesome, and what a great way to show how much you appreciate them, then on Mother’s and Father’s Day. Take them out, give them a gift or make them dinner – it’s a nice occasion that you can all share as a family.

5. Break the rules when it comes to gifts. Would it surprise you to hear that flowers and neck ties top the poles in the most popular gifts for mums and dads? Break the rules and get creative with your gifts to make them a memorable keepsake they’ll cherish forever.

6. Easter – one of the only times it’s acceptable to eat chocolate for breakfast. Over 90 million chocolate eggs are sold in the UK every year – with Easter accounting for 10% of chocolate spending for the whole year! Easter is your licence to eat as much chocolate as you like, but it’s not always a good idea, especially when you consider 1 in 5 kids have made themselves ill by stuffing their little faces… oooops!!

7. Celebrations keep our economy ticking. Just like Christmas, all of these occasions help keep our economy ticking over nicely. Valentine’s is worth the most, with £2.4 billion spent on gifts. Mother’s Day is worth £1.5 billion and while Father’s Day doesn’t quite generate as much spending, it’s still worth a cool £1 billion.

View full image

March 1, 2013
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why Brits Love Pets

If you’re one of the millions of households with a pet, you’ll be able to vouch for us when we say that we’re a nation of animal lovers.

Pets are a big part of family life, but they come at a cost as this infographic ‘The Real Cost Of Owning A Pet’ from Baines & Ernst shows.

Getting a pet is of course a big financial commitment, but if it is one you can afford, it’s more than rewarding.

Here are 7 reasons why Brits love animals…

1. They’re always pleased to see you. When you’ve had a long day, having a friendly face waiting for you at home can be a real tonic. Unlike a human partner, there’s no nagging about being late or sulking because you shouted at them this morning. Your four legged friend is just delighted to see you. And even if you go out of the room for a moment, you are guaranteed a similarly rapturous response on your return – your very own furry fan club.

2. They love you no matter what. Your pet sees you at your worst – first thing in the morning, last thing at night and all those times when you’ve worked yourself up over something ridiculous. And besides, who else would be willing to ignore your habit of sitting on the sofa in your underwear and cutting your toenails into an old pizza box?

3. They won’t spill your secrets. You know what it’s like – you’re given a piece of juicy gossip but are sworn to secrecy…. and immediately your lips start burning with the desire to tell someone. Chatting to your pet about what you have been told doesn’t count – and unlike spilling the beans to another person, there’s no risk they will slip up and drop you in it. Unless you have a talking dog, then let’s face it… you’ll make millions.

4. They stop you being lazy. You really should go to the gym but it’s cold outside and you would rather curl up on the sofa and relax. However, you have to take your furry friend for his evening walkies and there’s no escaping it, so off you go for your daily dose of exercise, whether you like it or not!

5. They’re a constant source of amusement. Sometimes it’s the simplest things that can make you smile, even if they have made you laugh countless times before. It’s difficult not to be amused at the sight of a cat going wild on cat nip or a dog chasing the reflection of a laser torch. And if your own pet is being boring, well, there’s always You Tube. Wonder whatever happened to Fenton…

6. You’re never short of company. Pets always make great company so it’s hard to feel like you’re alone with a pet in your life. They’re there from the moment you get up to when you go to bed. They’ll never complain that Match of the Day is on or if you’ve already seen that episode of Friends a million times before. Dogs will go out walking with you for hours, while cats will curl up next to you when you need a cuddle. They really are quite awesome.

7. There’s always someone else to blame for the smell. Pretty self explanatory… always useful! BAD DOG!

View full image

January 22, 2013
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Men Really Send Flowers

The time old tradition of sending flowers may be associated with well wishing, congratulations or the proclamation of love, however when men choose to furnish their loved one/ones with a fragrant bouquet of botanicals is rarely as plain as it seems. Forever masquerading as the simple, straight forward, uncomplicated strain of the human species, there lies a risk assessment, point scoring undercurrent to every decision a man makes, which would shock women. Well, maybe only some women. Actually, hardly any women, as most women are usually a few steps ahead in the second guessing game. For all those ladies who are still living in blissful ignorance of manipulating males, here are some illusion shattering things to look out for:

1. Persuasion. There is no such thing as a free bunch. One of the more obvious reasons, I grant you, but worth a mention anyway. Love hungry men trying to lure a mate or those who are trying to reignite passion need to flag their intentions. To send flowers may look like an innocent declaration of gentle feelings, but beware, strings will be attached.

2. Showing off. Although men have evolved from knuckle dragging primitives of yester year into modern day knuckle dragging primitives, they have failed to develop any colourful plumage. In lieu of shakeable eye-catching tail feathers or a flamboyant extendable quiff these simple-minded beasts resort to flowers, attempting to bedazzle their prey.

3. Distraction. How could a man considerate enough to send you flowers consider sending anyone but you flowers to? However, could those beautiful, fragrant roses have been sent to throw you off the scent? Always read the label. If they are simply addressed to ‘My Darling’, ‘Sweetheart’ or ‘Love Puff’, further questioning may be required.

4. Get Out Clause. So, you receive an arm full of Gladioli from your beloved, so glorious that it would make Morrissey weep with jealousy were he to unexpectedly clap eyes on it. Nevertheless, before you start swinging them round your head whilst singing ‘This Charming Man’, think. Has he, or is he planning on letting you down any time soon? Only time will tell.

5. Lazy. There’s not much to it really. Sending flowers cancels out having to waste any time or thought about what to get someone. Flowers can be ordered to and from anywhere in the world in less time that it takes to eat a doughnut. The old adage ‘It’s the thought that counts’ is true, but it is also the ‘effort’ and ‘imagination’ that counts, and will be counted.

6. Guilt. ‘Sorry’ does seem to be the hardest word and one that men feel they don’t have to bother actually saying if they have sent flowers. Avoiding the real issues and trying to curry favour with someone whom they may have wronged occasionally works. However, unless men man up and say exactly what they are sorry about, the flowers in question may count against them.

7. Love. Ok, ok. I’ll admit it. The majority of men who send flowers to their loved ones do so purely to make them happy. Crazy, I know, but in this cynical world we live in it is easy to forget that doing something to make someone feel all warm and fuzzy can in turn make the doer feel all warm and fuzzy too. So, why not start to make everything much warmer, fuzzier and if you suffer from hay fever, sneezier by buying someone they love some flowers.

December 1, 2012
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Your Relationship Is Doomed

Feel like you’re in a relationship that’s going south quickly? Get that sinking feeling every time you wake up next to your partner and realize they’re still there? You may be in a doomed relationship. There are many things that make a relationship go from sweet to sour: from trust issues to communication difficulties, here are seven reasons it’s time to call it quits.

1. The green-eyed monster. Jealousy rears its ugly head in almost all human relationships. But sometimes it becomes an overpowering emotion, threatening to destroy even the most solid partnerships. If you feel pangs of envy every time your partner gets a text, or goes out for a night ‘with the guys’, this may be a sign that jealousy is ruling your relationship.

2. Picking fights. I have friends – a couple – who are almost always fighting. They’re constantly bickering about who left the lights on or who forgot to pick up the dry cleaning. No matter who they’re with, or what they’re doing, they’re always nitpicking ─ constantly trying to get ‘one up’ on each other. It’s exhausting for them, and for everyone around them. They claim to love each other deeply but it would appear they love fighting with each other more.

3. Too much time alone… If you feel like you never see your partner; like one of you is always leaving as the other comes home, then perhaps your relationship is falling apart because you’ve forgotten how to be with your partner. If you don’t make time to spend with one another – time other than sleeping or watching TV silently on the couch – your relationship can’t grow.

4. …and too much time together. Perhaps you’re feeling suffocated by spending too much time with your partner. Maybe you begin every sentence with “We…” instead of “I…”. Maybe you spend every moment you’re not together texting each other gross, overly affectionate texts that say “Miss you honeybear”. If any of these sound familiar, maybe you need to get some hobbies, or get out more.

5. You hate each other’s friends. There’s always one person in your partner’s circle of friends who’ll rub you the wrong way. Maybe it’s the tacky girl who keeps asking when he’s going to put a ring on it, or that douchey guy who stares at your boobs. But if you can’t find a way to get along with anyone of each other’s friends, it may be time to re-evaluate the relationship. (Or get new friends.)

6. It’s not working in the bedroom. You can’t fake chemistry. If you and your partner are having troubles in the bedroom, it may be because you’re not communicating. Or it may just be because your lover doesn’t know what he or she is doing. While most couples won’t have truly equal sex drives, being in a relationship should be a good guarantee that you’ll get some action at least once in a while. If that’s not happening, it may be time to pack your bags.

7. You want totally different things. You may find yourself in a relationship that has all the chemistry and passion of a Hollywood movie, but little of the companionship and compatibility that defines a great, long-lasting relationship. And you may just find yourself wanting totally different things than your partner – whether it’s more kids or more romance.

There’s nothing wrong with admitting that it’s just not working. And for your next relationship, try to aim for compatibility over chemistry. Using an online dating service like eHarmony Canada means that you can browse the profiles of people with whom you really connect.

October 10, 2012
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why Brits Love Fish And Chips

Drenched in salt and vinegar and melt-in-the-mouth delicious, Fish and Chips is one of the most delectable; one of the most naughtiest dishes in the UK and us Brits LOVE it!

Here are 7 Reasons why a mouth-watering portion of steaming hot Fish and Chips remains the nation’s favourite dish…

1. Fish and chips is quintessentially British. The first British Chip Shop opened in Mossley, Lancashire in the 1850s and since then, the country has been crazy for a good hearty portion of Fish and Chips. By the 1930s, there were 35,000 chippies! So it’s no wonder that it’s a dish that’s become synonymous with British culture and is as quintessentially British as cucumber sandwiches, double decker buses, red post boxes and moaning about the weather!

2. It tastes and smells so good!! Freshly mown grass, baking bread and sizzling bacon all feature high on the list of best-loved aromas in Britain, but there is one smell that beats them all…

Yep, you’ve guessed it – the tempting aroma of fish and chips topped a poll that aimed to discover the UK’s most preferred smell. Fried goodness covered in mouth-watering lashings of salt and vinegar – we bet you can smell it now. Simply delicious! The heady combination of smell and flavour is enough to make anyone on a diet question their healthy eating intentions and it’s also probably one of the only dishes that causes arguments between couples. You know the routine – the guy orders the tasty accompaniment alongside his steak, the lady orders the side salad; then by the end of the meal the guy is lucky if he’s had more than a forkful. Ladies, for the sake of men everywhere – get your own chips!!

3. Reminds you of the good times. Long before our high street was packed with takeaways offering delectable delights from around the world on every corner, our staple fast food was the good old fashioned fish and chips!

So it’s no wonder that the heady whiff of the good stuff can send us spiralling into a world of nostalgia – day trips to the seaside as a kid; Friday night tea-time treats; sharing a bag on the way home from the cinema after your first ever date; the great love story that started in the queue of a chip shop after a night out… ah memories.

4. You’re never too far from a chippy. The chip shop boom hit in the 1930s when the UK had more than 35,000 fish and chip shops. The dish was in such high demand that that some chippies had to employ doormen to oversee the queues!

Now we’re a little bit less heavy handed about getting our grubby mitts on the greasy goodness but there are still 11,000 chippies in the UK today.

And with three billion chip dishes served across the country every year – making up 300 million meals in total – you’re never too far away from a tasty portion.

But it’s not just us Brits who love the potato treat – oh no! Did you know that Belgian holds the rather quirky record of cooking chips for the longest amount of time? Chris Verschueren cooked up a storm when he served 15,000 portions of chips in a whopping 83 hours!

But back on home soil, a Yorkshire fryer – The Wensleydale Heifer – now holds the record for the largest portion of fish and chips, weighing in at 101lbs and beating the existing Massachusetts record by 24lbs.

5. Kept our troops going! It’s a hearty filling meal for sure, but did you know that during the Second World War, chips were one of the few foods that were not rationed?

So when our troops were out fighting in the fields, the good old fashioned, ever-reliable portion of chips kept them going!

6. Famous people can’t resist it. The first chippy opened in the UK in the 1850s, so we’re pretty sure Queen Victoria dined on a fine portion of ye olde fish and chips. It was also the meal of choice US President Barrack Obama’s children when his wife Michelle visited the UK. And the ever eccentric Lady Gaga tucked into a delicious portion washed down with whisky before she met the Queen earlier this year! Who knows, this could inspire her next food-related outfit….

7. Created other bonkers delicacies. Deep fried Mars Bars. We don’t need to say anymore. Don’t judge – just enjoy!

What about the future of the nation’s favourite dish? Well, there are sad times ahead for our beloved dish and it’s all because of inflation. Back in the 1970s, you could expect to pay a very modest 25p for a portion, but then inflation took hold – and it hasn’t stopped since.

The infographic ‘Counting the Cost of Fish and Chips’ created by the experts at Baines and Ernst – a leading financial solutions company – showed that the biggest price increase occurred during 1975 and 1976.

Prices jumped from 40p to 50p – going up to 83p by the 1980s. Now you can expect to pay £3.30 for a portion but up to as much as £5 if you live in London – the highest price in the UK!

So it looks like what was once a Friday night regular is now becoming a rare treat for families around the UK.

Article by Baines & Ernst
This article and infographic ‘Counting the Cost of Fish and Chips’ was written by Baines and Ernst – one of the country’s leading providers of debt help in the UK.

September 7, 2012
Guest Post: 7 Reasons To Do Your Research When Online Dating

There are over 7 million singles in the UK looking for a long-term relationship, many of whom turn to online dating to find a partner. Online dating can be a great way of finding somebody you share things in common with, but it is important to do your research both on the website you choose as well as on the people you talk to. Here are 7 reasons why…

1. They could be bending the truth. Some people just can’t resist the urge to be economical with the truth on their internet dating profiles. It’s generally about small things, like certain interests, weight, and sometimes people shed a few years off their age. This is because of the tension between the desire to be truthful and also give the best impression. If it´s just a minor lie, be understanding – after all, your profile may not have been totally honest either. However, some may use the anonymity of online communities to deceive you, so stay savvy.

2. They could be unfit for dating. Some people may be slightly troubled, whether that is because of a bad break-up or family issues. This may come across in their profile and when you talk to them – if it does, go with your instinct and tell them you´re not interested. Sometimes, if somebody comes across as fragile, it can be an attractive quality, as you might want to help them get better, but it is often the case that they have to do this for themselves. If somebody appears to be completely off their rocker – stay well away!

3. They may be related. You know that awkward moment at a family wedding when you accidentally kiss a third cousin or –gulp – someone from an even closer branch of the family tree? Well, before you start sending flirty messages to someone, just make sure they´re not in any way related or, perhaps just as bad, an ex.

4. They may be attached. Some people on dating websites are actually in a relationship. It is always worth doing some research on somebody for this reason, as the internet can provide a good cover for people and it can be difficult to know if somebody is lying. Do a background check – type their name into Google and Facebook and see what comes up. If you suspect they might not be genuine, ask them straight out.

5. They aren´t looking for long term. Before you get all excited about someone who seems promising, make sure they´re looking for the same thing as you. Not everyone is looking to commit, and some are scared of it, so check out their profile, ask them some questions and try to gauge what kind of place they´re in and what they want.

6. There is a Christian Grey or Lara Croft within an overweight, unemployed exterior. Hopefully not both at the same time… that would just be weird. They have potential – they´re sweet and kind – if only they would eat less, exercise more and get a job. That’s where you come in on your white horse. If only human relationships could be a simple matter of asking: ‘do you think you will change or become more interesting?’ And the other person would answer: ‘no’. That would be great, wouldn’t it? Instead, you could be a little less direct and just try to gauge their personality – if they seem motivated and positive they may be willing to change.

7. They are boring. These people bang on and on about a whole lot of nothing. They aren’t interested in anything except themselves. Their narcissism knows no end. If they don’t ask questions about you or seem interested in you online or on the first date, stay right away. On some dating websites people answer interesting, stimulating questions and give awesome answers. There’s no time in life to be boring so if you´re after singles with originality and flair, click here.

August 2, 2012
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why We Love To Celebrate

There are celebrations for almost everything these days – celebrations for the birth of Christ, celebrations for the death of Christ, for the resurrection of Christ, for the Holy Commemoration of the First Tooth lost by Christ. All the partying can leave you worn out, but the strange things is that we always want more; celebrating never seems to get old. So why do we love to celebrate so much?

1. So what? I’m celebrating! We love celebrations because they are a great excuse for doing things in excess. Celebrations are a time to lose yourself in over indulgence. Over the Christmas period, we celebrate so much that we actually expect to put weight on through sheer greed. But so what if you’re on your third bottle of wine or you fifth cheese cake? You’re celebrating, and that’s sound reasoning that no one can argue with.

2. Sorry boss, I was celebrating. If you’ve had a big celebration the next day can be a bit of an effort, especially if you have to go into work. However, it would take a truly stone hearted boss not to be understanding if you were to phone up and explain that the reason you can’t make it in to work today is because you got absolutely smashed at a wicked celebration last night and you are really hungover and probably still quite hammered now. You’ll probably even be able to claim it under sick leave.

3. Yeah come on over, we’re having a celebration! You might not see your friends and family much over the course year, but when a celebration comes around it’s always a great excuse to get everyone together. Even the people who no one likes get invited, like old auntie Susan who sucks the chocolate off chocolate covered peanuts and then puts them back in the bowl, because it just wouldn’t be a proper celebration without her sickening antics.

4. Because the government tell us to. In reality, celebrating is not something that we’re born to enjoy, it’s not a hard wired trait, but we grow to like it through covert conditioning by the government. The government shove celebrations down our throats until we celebrate so much that we celebrate when there isn’t even anything to celebrate, like with the Diamond Jubilee. They do it because they see it as an easy way to boost the economy through the sale of party hats and meringue.

5. I love you, man! When you’re high on celebrating, certain things become acceptable, including telling complete strangers how much you appreciate them. In the midst of a celebration, handing out personalised birthday cards with the words “I love you” to people you don’t even know when it is even their birthday doesn’t seem weird. It only becomes creepy the day after.

6. For purveyors of bad music. One of the major reasons for the continued success of celebrations is that it keeps the age old industry of bad music churning on. Where would the performers of The Time Warp, Oops Upside Your Head and Fast Food Song be without the millions of royalties they get from their songs being played at celebrations? In a retirement home, picking bits of food out of their beards is where.

7. To liven up funerals. Funerals can be quite solemn and formal events, some may even argue dull, especially if you weren’t particularly well acquainted with the departed. However, the thing that makes them worthwhile, and the reason that most people go to them, is the brilliant laugh that you can have at the celebration that follows. The finger buffet is always well stocked, and, in general, it’s a free bar.

July 21, 2012
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why A Fridge Freezer Is Your Best Friend

When life gets too tough we all do it, we all turn to that one shiny square symbol of comfort, yes you got it in one, the fridge freezer combo. I understand that the fridge-freezer is so much more than an appliance; it shelters your beer, hides the children’s treats and offers you a place to stash your ready meals from the Mrs (who happens to think you have managed to learn how to cook whilst she is at yoga). These are the 7 reasons why your Fridge Freezer is your best friend…

1. Fridge-freezer is the most practical invention on the planet. Think about it guys; where would we be without the fridge-freezer combo? Well I will tell you, we wouldn’t be that far behind damn dirty apes. The sheer practicality and advancements in technology part us from an archaic existence and through the pure genius of combining both the fridge and freezer (someone needs a pat on the back for that) we are able to store more and more food. We are basically like advanced technological squirrels.

2. Making your mates jealous. Having the best fridge-freezer is guaranteed to make your mates envious, they won’t let you see this jealous streak but be warned they are secretly judging you on the size of your new appliance. But hey, relax, ask them if they want a drink; then see if they want ice with that, obviously from your amazing new built in fridge ice dispenser.

3. Had a bad day? Your fridge-freezer is there for you. So the kids insist on kicking you in the leg and drawing on the newly decorated walls. After 4 hours of trying to bribe reason with them they have finally surrendered and fallen asleep. You still have a mountain of paper work to go through (don’t forget to wipe down the walls too). Threat no more the fridge is here for you grab an ice cold beer and some ice-cream before the wife emerges from the bath. The fridge-freezer demands that you have some “you time”.

4. Think of your beers and ready meals, they deserve a good home. Let’s face it (despite what your wife thinks) you rely on the odd ready meal to feed yourself and the kids on the nights she insists she needs to work anyway. Think about it; with a bigger, more efficient, fridge-freezer you can hide such meals better plus nobody will find that extra 4 pack of cans behind the salad draw.

5. It can protect you from nuclear explosions. If there is one thing that we all learned from the brilliant – and in no way a disgrace to the adventure genre – movie, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, it’s that climbing into your fridge will leave you unscathed and ready to embrace the aftermath of a nuclear holocaust. It’s in a movie, so it has to be 100% scientifically accurate. Nice one, Mr Fridge.

6. Man Drawer: fridge style. Here’s some food for thought if you’re diplomatic and extra complimentary to your other half maybe she will give you the huge privilege of having a man drawer: fridge style? Yeah just imagine a man drawer in your freaking fridge, your own refrigerated cubby hole to store all of your special treats. Let’s cut to the chase; it would basically be the ‘beer and meat’ drawer, with rules stipulating that all salads and low fat yoghurts be banished.

7. The fridge-freezer is the heart of any family home. No matter how you dress it, the fridge- freezer combo is an industrial giver of family happiness and joyous memories. Without it, chances are you would have died from food poisoning, starvation, heartbreak and spontaneous combustion. And really who wants that; not me! I would rather have a fridge-freezer. So I suggest you get yourself a new best friend; a fridge-freezer. Guaranteed not to break your heart.

Author Bio: Rachel Hurley spends her days working as a writer for Appliances Online. In her spare time she likes to rescue snails, watch Dexter and overdose on caffeine. She is also due to release her first solo single with Universal, entitled ‘Oh joyous Fridge’, with a B-side track ‘Refrigeration for the Nation’. Available to download now, only $9.95.

July 15, 2012