Tag: Cost

Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why You Need The iPhone 4S

Apple’s latest and greatest iPhone has taken the internet by storm, polarising opinion but still garnering a shedload of reviews in the process. Love, hate or tolerate it, there’s no hiding from the 4S this autumn. iPhone 4S deals are going on sale this weekend, so expect lengthy queues outside an Apple store near you. If you’re still unsure about what the iPhone 4S has to offer, here are seven reasons why you need to empty your wallet in order to fill your pocket with this mobile marvel.

It’s an iPhone 4S

1. Voice Activation. Listen up, button-pressing luddites, because with Siri voice activation this only needs said once: The future is here, and guess what? It speaks your freaking language. The iPhone’s new voice recognition technology is so advanced that you can dictate emails and text messages and even have them read back to you. Similarly, you can have your phone read out text messages you’ve received, leaving you truly hands-free. Worried about the weather? Ask Siri ‘Do I need an umbrella?’ and a smarter, less whiney version of C3PO will get back to you with the forecast. Hopefully.

2. Beefed Up Battery. We’re not just talking about relief from that irritating bleep bleep that tells you you’re low on juice. (Surely the bleep bleep is only serving to further drain the battery?) The battery fitted to the 4S allows you to talk for up to eight hours on 3G (14 hours on 2G); browse the internet for up to six hours (nine on Wi-Fi); watch up to ten hours of video; and listen to music for an eardrum-shattering 40 hours straight. If you’re a fair weather phone user, you’ll be pleased to hear that the 4S has standby power for 200 hours. If maths isn’t your thing, that’s over a week, incidentally.

3. Improved Camera. Are you truly ready for your close-up? Because this camera catches every wrinkle and every blemish, with eight megapixels working hard to prove that the camera doesn’t lie. The new cam has the ability to shoot moving pictures at a highly light-sensitive and impressive 1080p. You can finally leave your digital camera at home without worrying that you’ll miss a moment, although you may have to spend far more time getting ready to ensure you always look your best when a snap happy iPhone 4S owner is in your vicinity.

4. iOS 5. The newest Apple operating system can be downloaded by all iPhone users, but the 4S has it built in. The iOS 5 is powered by an A5 chip processor similar to the one found on the iPad 2 and can operate at twice the speed of the iPhone 4. Apple have also implemented complete Twitter integration with the iOS 5, meaning that fans of the site can effortlessly tweet from their phones. The Facebook app for iPad has also been deemed iOS 4.0 compatible; expect to see it migrating to iOS 5 in the not-too-distant future.

5. AirPlay Mirroring. With the 4S you can mirror your iPhone’s screen to your TV set via an Apple TV unit. Browse the web; watch a movie; view a slideshow – all on a big screen. This feature is especially exciting for game developers who no longer have to design graphics solely for a small screen. Who needs a Wii when you have AirPlay?

6. It Isn’t The iPhone 4… …which means no more antenna problems. The iPhone 4S has fixed the pesky signal problems that caused such a stir upon the release of its predecessor. It has a dual-antenna design that allows the phone to switch in areas of poor signal, and choose the stronger of the two in true Darwinian style. The best part of this is that you will no longer need one of those silly bumper cases for the 4S.

7. It Looks Virtually Identical To Its Predecessor. Hang on, so the 4S looks almost the same as the iPhone 4? Isn’t that a bad thing? When the iPhone 4 was released, it was heralded as being one of the sleekest, slickest handsets on the market. Nothing’s changed since then; it still holds its own against the competition. Why change a winning formula? Some people are worried that its identical looks will mean people will not be able to instantly recognize that you have the very latest iPhone. On the contrary though, your iPhone 4S will be instantly identifiable by the already mentioned lack of bumper case.

So there you have it: seven reasons why 4S is best.

October 16, 2011
Guest Post: 7 Reasons There Is No Such Thing As A Free Lunch

It has, I think you’ll agree, been too long. Too long since Dr Simon Percy Jennifer Best sat on the 7 Reasons sofa and shared with us thoughts from the deepest sanctums of his mind. Today that changes. Because he’s back. He needs no further introduction so we’ll leave you in his capable hands. We’re off to the pub for lunch. He’s paying.

‘Free Lunch’ by The Ethicurean

“There’s no such thing as a free lunch” is one of those glib phrases that people trot out and everyone accepts without investigation in to its accuracy. Now you don’t need to, because here I give seven reasons as to why there really is no such thing as a free lunch.

1. Potential Suitors. Often on a date, especially in these enlightened times, people will spilt the bill. But there might be a rare occasion when you’re taken out for a meal and the other person offers to pay. “Great,” you think. “A free lunch!” Wrong. The chances are that they will want something in return, a walk along the beach, a goodnight kiss, your hand in marriage. Would you swap any of these for a spaghetti carbonara? No. Nor would I.

2. Aged Relatives. Imagine the scene. You’re an impoverished student and your Great Aunt Doris* rings you up and invites you round for Sunday lunch. “Great,” you say to yourself. “A change from tinned tuna and beans on toast, and a free lunch!” Wrong. You arrive and while the smell of roast beef is wafting through the house, Great Aunt Doris will ask you for help with something relatively straight forward, changing a light bulb for example…. By the time you’re able to escape several hours later you’ve cut the grass, creosoted the fence, put out the bins, cleaned out the guttering and regrouted the bathroom. You’ve saved her several hundred pounds and given vast quantities of labour in return for a bit of overcooked beef and soggy Yorkshire puddings.

3. Business Lunches. We’ve all been there. Arranging a meeting and your colleague/client says, “why don’t we meet over lunch, we can get it on expenses”. “Excellent,” you think. “A day that I don’t have to pay for an over-priced sandwich and get a free lunch!” Wrong. Okay, you can get to see people and impress your colleagues, but it requires you to talk to people and costs valuable time. There is a surefire rule that applies to meetings: not only do they cost valuable time, but you invariably leave them with more work to do than at the start. Is the free lunch worth it when you have to stay in work late and buy an expensive Chinese takeaway for dinner so you don’t collapse with starvation before you get home?

The same applies to conferences where, although the lunch is free, the cost is to your soul. It dies around the same time as the first speaker puts up his fourteenth powerpoint slide.

4. Friends With Children. There is a stage in many people’s lives where you are single, but have friends who are married with kids. You probably get to see these friends less often. Then, when summer starts they ring you, “come round for a barbecue, we’ve still got lots of wine left over from Timmy’s christening so there’s no need for you to bring anything”. You’re free, you want to see them and excited at the prospect of free food AND drink. Well, calm your excitement. This invitation is just a thinly veiled ruse by the parents to neck as much chardonnay as they can while their hyperactive children, thrilled by the novelty of a new adult, begs you to play with them. As for the free lunch? Not a bit of it. Okay, you get plenty of grilled chicken and salad and a couple of glasses of wine. Cost to you: a dry cleaning bill for your grass stained trousers, a new hat after your panama is used as a Frisbee and a large chiropractors bill having been rugby tackled by “little” Jamie, who is nine years old but already the size and weight of Brian Moore.

5. Parents Of Your Future Spouse. Picture the scene. You’ve been with your girlfriend/boyfriend/partner for a respectable length of time. Then one day they say to you, “my parents have invited us for lunch on Sunday” Cue you breaking out into a cold sweat about what to take them. Your partner reassures you that their mother doesn’t need flowers, and their father doesn’t need a bottle of Scotch. “Phew,” you think. “A free lunch!” Wrong. You’re on to a loser here. If it goes badly and you’re (even inadvertently) rude about them/their house/their food/their dog or, perhaps worse, you’re too friendly and don’t give your partner enough attention, then you pay by having to buy them presents in recompense. If it goes really well it will progress your relationship to the stage where it costs you a hefty amount for an engagement ring or your life if you find yourself married to them.

6. Single Friends. I, like lots of people, have single friends who are, lets face it, what can charitably be described as “hard work”** When your friend that fits that description sends you an innocuous text message saying, “let’s meet for lunch, my treat,” you may think that means a free lunch and a pleasant afternoon. That text message notification should actually be an alarm bell, as what it actually means is an afternoon where you spend hours counselling them about their life, their job, their latest (failed) relationship, clothes and the price of garden furniture. This involves you consuming the annual output of a medium sized French vineyard to cope. They join you in polishing off several bottles, then when the bill comes they say, “I’ll pay for the food, can you get the wine?”. Free lunch? Not a bit of it. There’s a very real prospect that you will need to remortagage your house to pay your credit card bill that month.

7. Yourself. Clearly the only safe person to have lunch with is yourself, you would be paying so obviously it wouldn’t be a free lunch, but it’s likely it will be cheaper than the other options.

*If you don’t have a Great Aunt Doris then you can imagine my Great Aunt Doris.

** I don’t rule out the possibility that I am, for some of my friends ‘hard work’.

October 15, 2011
Guest Post: 7 Reasons To Holiday In The UK

Forget the Costa del Sol, it’s time to embrace Costa del Brighton. For too long, too many people have ignored the UK as a holiday destination. Why they have done so remains a complete mystery, but it’s time for a change. Here are just seven reasons you should ignore those foreign places and keep it British.

1. Active Pursuits. Our changeable and unreliable weather is the butt of many jokes, but let’s be honest, not everyone wants to lounge around on a beach in 30+ degree heat every day. Especially when you have a German eyeing up your sun lounger. All too often, when you go abroad you just end up sitting on the beach or by the pool in an attempt to keep cool. This is fine if doing nothing is what you had in mind, but if you want to be active and explore your surroundings, this can be quite limiting. There’s only so long you can go on a tour of the hotel reception before it gets a bit same-y. So take a look at a UK holiday; you may be surprised at the wealth of activities on offer. You might not have noticed, but we even have one or two beautiful, award winning beaches of our own.

2. Dizzy Heights. If you are one of the many people who don’t like flying, jetting off on a foreign holiday may very well be your idea of hell. Wherever you are in the UK, you are never far from a superb tourist destination. Coastal cottages in the West Country, in the south or in the Scottish Highlands allow you to get away from the stresses of home life without having to travel for hours upon hours.

3. Greenery. Holidaying in the UK is greener. And we don’t mean just the grass: consider your carbon foot print. It is estimated that the vast number of commercial flights each year are pumping 600 million tonnes of carbon dioxide directly into the atmosphere. By around 2020, air travel is expected to be the single biggest contributor to global warming. Basically, what we’re saying is, if you don’t go on holiday in the UK, you are killing your grandchildren.

4. When Is A Bargain A Rip-Off? You may have noticed that, financially speaking, times are hard in the UK at the moment. Air travel can be expensive but you will also need to take into account the exchange rate. It is no good bagging a bargain abroad if you find that everything is so expensive that you can’t go out. You’ll have to stay in your room and watch Sky News all day.

5. All In The Chalet Together. Holidaying here in the UK and spending your hard earned cash in our towns and cities is good for our economy. In 2010, David Cameron suggested that the UK has been drastically underselling itself as a tourist destination. At a conference in London, Mr Cameron urged more Brits to holiday in the UK, emphasising that tourism is “one of the best and fastest ways of generating the jobs we need so badly in this country”. And, just for the sake of political balance, Ed Miliband has just this week said he had a lovely time in Liverpool – bar the power cuts. So there we go. Agreement across the political spectrum.

6. Familiarity Breeds Content. Familiarity can be an important factor for those wishing to stay in the UK. If you enjoy good old English meat and two veg, an English fry up for breakfast, the occasional fish and chip supper or a battered Mars bar, then you can’t go far wrong here.

7. Sprechen Sie The Lingo. Unless you’re going to Glasgow, there will be no need for a phrase book every time you want to buy something or order in a restaurant. So for something truly British, look at one of the many coastal cottages available throughout the UK at Sykes Cottages.

If you usually holiday abroad but you are considering staying the UK for a change or for one of the reasons above, then you may very well find yourself surprised. The UK has so many stunning destinations. With a little research you should be able to find the perfect place and you may very well end up wondering why you’ve been bothering to go abroad every year.

October 2, 2011
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why Cruising Is Better Than Flying

Had the Steve Martin/John Candy film been called Trains, Planes, Boats and Automobiles, you get the feeling that it would have been a whole lot better. Oscar winning probably. I mean boats are awesome. Especially cruise liners. They’re like floating cities. Far better than the hovering villages you get in the sky. Yep, cruising is definitely better than flying. And here’s Natasha to tell you why.

Cruises are vacation domains of choice. When you decide to cruise through your holiday, you really mean it. No rush, long lines, cramped seating or foot-in-mouth leg accommodations. To fully appreciate the benefits of a cruise, seven areas of consideration on whether to fly or to cruise on are listed below.

1. Nuts. Your vacation begins with transportation costs in getting to the airport. Final flight fares have many added fees that make the price very expensive, and that’s before your vacation begins. Fees are added by governments for security, by airports and airlines for baggage handling, food, seating preference, paper boarding passes, etc, etc, and so forth. Some airlines may provide you with salty snacks, like pretzels, chips or nuts, but don’t be fooled. It’s a ploy to make you thirsty enough to pay an outrageous $5 for a 12 oz can of soda.

A cruise program is a complete package that starts when you arrive on board; no added handling fees by cruise lines or port authorities for you coming to the ship, especially since the ship cannot come to you.

2. Luggage. The amount of luggage and what you can pack in the bags that you take on an aircraft has become very restricted. Some airlines do not even permit one free bag. Everything either must fit into a small sandwich size plastic bag for carry-on or go into stored baggage.

On a cruise ship you can bring as many suitcases as you want. The only restriction would be to their ability to all fit in your cabin.

3. Legs. Airlines have become creative in how they re-configure the seating arrangements in order to put in more rows of seats. This translates into lose of leg room and cramped seating for you, especially if you are the one stuffed into the middle seat. So, this is not how you planned to spend the start of your holiday? I agree with you…this is a very uncomfortable beginning.

Cramped situations do not exist on cruise ships, neither in your cabin, on deck, or in any of the facilities. In fact, most areas are as large as, or larger, than on-land locations.

4. Unpack, Pack And Repeat. When your flight is complete, and you have collected your bags, you must travel to and register at a hotel. You hope that they have not lost your registration, even though you have a confirmation letter. You get your luggage into your room and unpack. You know that you are going to visit several different locations and this is just the first of numerous unpacking and packing exercises that you will be going through. Light, wrinkle-free clothing was your only choice for moving around. Now you have the hotel costs and restaurant costs to add to funds you have already spent on airfare.

The beauty of a cruise package is that it is all inclusive of your room, meals, and elected entertainment programs. You do not have to do the wallet-reach move when you arrive on board or whenever you get hungry; a cruise is a no guilt and no added food fees experience.

5. Wrong Side Of The Road. You have paid the costs of flying to a vacation location, checked into a hotel, had a meal or two, and now you want to tour the surrounding area. You tried to sign up for a guided tour only to find out they either leave several hours before your vacation mornings start or they rush you through the area with hardly a stop to take pictures or buy a souvenir. This is too hasty for your taste. There is nothing left to do but rent a vehicle and learn to navigate the roads and road signs of another country. You did get a temporary international driver’s license, right?

On a cruise ship it is guaranteed that rental cars will not be a problem as none are needed. If someone does need mobile assistance, personal motor carts and wheelchairs are available. At port stops the cruise lines arrange for tours that again eliminate rental needs. If you do chose to go ashore for personal touring please watch the time so you are back in time to sail. The Captain does not want to leave anyone behind, but the ship has no such emotions. Being left behind would be an added adventure and cost when you need to arrange another way to meet your ship at the next port of call.

6. Tighten Those Purse Strings. After flying to a holiday location, staying at several hotels, purchasing your own meals and arranging your own transportation, you may have to include another cost for entertainment, like going to a theatre, museum, or night club. The wallet-reach move never ends.

Cruise ships have dancing, bingo, comedy, and Vegas style entertainment that does not add any cost to your fun.

7. Move It, Move it. Flight attendants prefer that you stay in your seat. Aisle space is limited and does not encourage socializing.

The crew of a ship will do all they can to get you up and out of a seat to take advantage of all the activities. A cruise is a perfect place to meet and make new friends or to get to know better the people you came with.

With flying, everything is another cost, another detail and another worry that something could go wrong. Sea cruises are beautiful, stress free, wallet friendly experience that you will want to enjoy time and again.

This article was written by Natasha Tasha, on behalf of Flight Centre, Australia, offering great selection of cheap international flights to destinations world wide.

September 25, 2011
Guest Post: 7 Reasons To Holiday In South Africa

The nights are drawing in. The temperature is dropping. There is resentment in the air. Summer never arrived. As a result throngs of disgruntled Brits are marching on Heathrow. Destination holiday. But with so many countries to choose from, where do you buy a ticket to? Today Craig Patterson puts his humorous case forward for South Africa.

South Africa is a pretty amazing place; a country nicknamed the ‘Rainbow nation’ for its incredible cultural diversity and eclectic geography (as opposed to any parallels with the long running British children’s TV show featuring Geoffrey Hayes and a cast of rather off-beat puppet companions Zippy, Bungle and for some reason a camp hippo called George). South Africa is a vibrant and beautiful place that promises one of the most memorable and truly privileging experiences in the world. So let’s take a closer look at the seven reasons that make South Africa holidays so good.

1. ‘Damn Nature, You Scary!’ South Africa is home to some of the most iconic wildlife on the planet and nowhere else in Africa are you more likely to see the famous ‘Big Five’; like the fab four but considerably more toothy and considerably less Liverpudlian these were the animals once considered by colonial hunters as the most dangerous on the continent: lions, leopards, rhinos, elephants and Chuck Norris…I mean buffaloes. The Kruger National Park in the North East of the country is widely regarded as one of the richest and most diverse game reserves in all of Africa boasting an abundance of wildlife, and even the occasional hippo; although I can’t promise they will be either as camp or as pink as George. Safari holidays are becoming more and more popular and a break to South Africa promises a truly exhilarating experience.

2. Language And Time. Okay, so it might take an eleven and a half hour flight to get there but let’s face it, that’s just like watching all three extended editions of the Lord of the Rings films back to back; peace of cake. One great thing about travelling to South Africa for Western European tourists in particular is that it’s almost entirely down hill and by that I mean you fly on essentially the same longitude the whole way; so despite jumping on a rather lengthy flight you will still arrive in Cape Town or Johannesburg only 1 or 2 hours ahead of GMT. Cash back! Also thanks to a lengthy colonial occupation a vast majority of South Africans speak English, which perhaps unfortunately for some renders ineffectual that old British holiday-making ritual of trying to make other nationalities comprehend you by pointing at something and then saying it louder and slower again in English. This also presents a great opportunity to perfect your beloved South African accent; the one that everyone says sounds Russian but you know is spot on.

3. The Weather’s Great…Usually. The weather in South Africa is quite similar to the climate in Britain in the same way that Blue Nun is quite similar to Dom Perignon. The country actually promises pleasant conditions throughout the year although there is a discernible seasonal shift around September and April. Thanks to the wizardry of astrophysics and the orbital tilt of the planet’s axis as a country in the Southern Hemisphere South Africa experiences apposite seasonal changes to its hemispherical counterparts ‘up north’ meaning that when it is British winter it is in fact South African summer. Not only does this assert the country as a great winter warmer destination, but the cooler drier period from June to September is actually the best time for game viewing and perfectly timed for a jolly summer holiday. All of this said South Africa is prone to its occasional climatic clanger and only as recently as this year many residents in the Eastern Cape awoke to a blanket of thick snow, maybe not so different eh?

4. Malaria Free. Unlike most other destinations in Southern Africa, South Africa is almost entirely malaria free with only the very north-eastern reaches moderately at risk. A lot of people presume that when they travel to South Africa they will have to prescribe to a cocktail of pills and drugs that Keith Richards would be proud of, but thanks to the geographical location of the country travellers and perhaps young children in particular needn’t worry about the effects of those infamous and much belied bloodsuckers, no not the HMRC, mosquitoes.

5. Nelson Says So. The Granddad that everyone wishes they had, Nelson Mandela, is an icon, not only in South Africa but across the globe. The former president was notoriously imprisoned for over 27 years for his role in the anti apartheid movement much of which he spent on Robben Island. To trace the history and evolution of modern South Africa is a wonderful thing and there are many museums and exhibits dedicated to the country’s colourful and undeniably tumultuous past. Mandela still epitomises the hope and spirit shared by millions of South Africans for a bright and fruitful future. He also looks just like Morgan Freeman who incidentally played him in 2009 biopic, Invictus – a little pub ammo for you.

6. Cape Town. Cape Town is a pretty hip and happening place and is the most visited destination within the most visited country in Africa. Originally established by the Dutch who stopped by for a smoke and a pancake in the mid 17th century and decided to stay, today Cape Town is a busy metropolis, although interestingly not the outright capital as South Africa actually has three – make up your minds guys. With such famous sights as the V&A waterfront, Table Mountain and the nearby Cape of Good Hope as well as a plethora (great word, just rolls off the tongue) of boutique shops restaurants and bars there will be something to keep everyone entertained.

7. Affordable. You might think that a holiday to South Africa would cost you an arm and a leg (I suppose it might depending upon how close you get to the lions) but in fact you don’t have to be the CEO of De Beers to afford even a relatively luxurious trip. The incredible variety of experiences on offer in South Africa means that whatever budget you have to work with you can still see the best of this country. OK, so you’re understandably going to have to fork out more than you would for a long weekend in Whitby but in a time when the purse strings are even tighter than usual you can still enjoy an ‘exotic’ break at a competitive price.

September 24, 2011
Guest Post: 7 Reasons To Grow A Beard This Winter

The full beard, like many types of groomed facial hair, is a beautiful thing. But it’s also one that appears to fallen by the wayside of popular fashion. That is not a trend that Tommy George of www.idealo.co.uk wants to see continue. Here are seven reasons why.

Canada's Adam Kleeberger Keeps His Face Warm During The Rugby World Cup

1. Cost. Razors are expensive. Hair grows for free. You do the math(s). Nowadays, sixteen bladed, all singing, all dancing razor blades that not only scratch your face off but also sing the national anthem of Tonga are all the rage. However, they are REALLY expensive. Expensive enough that if a chap were to stop buying razor blades for an entire month, he could afford a whole set of Lego. Now would you rather have a sore face and no distraction or look cool AND have a ton of bricks to play with?

2. Competition. Men love a competition. Particularly competitions to judge who is most manly. In the animal kingdom, lions, tigers and bears fight and kill for this privilege – all you have to do is grow the best beard amongst your rosy-chopped and clean-shaven peers. All of the bragging rights in the pub – and with it all of the women – will be yours. Sort of like Rasputin, but with an even more mythical effect.

3. Fish Fingers. For gentleman of a more distinguished grey persuasion, it is possible that after several hard months of beard growing, people will mistake you for Captain Birdseye (particularly if you should choose to wear a naval uniform and wink a lot.). Upon realising this, total strangers will offer you the delicious fishy snacks out of pure courtesy. Another saving – and fish fingers don’t come cheap.

4. Fear. No man really likes children. Children are loud, small and, most importantly, banned from the pub – if you’re pub isn’t a swanky gastro-pub with tablecloths and disinfectant in the lager that is. So what better way to scare off little Jonny than to grow an enormous, terrifying beard and mutter under your breath? There is a reason children always cry when sitting on Santa Claus’ knee at Christmas. Use it to your advantage. Or alternatively buy a clown suit.

5. Loss. You will find after your beard advances past a stubbly stage and beyond the echelons of bumfluff, that one can grow quite attached to the looming dark mass upon ones cheeks and become used to the endless compliments that one receives on its behalf. So, when the beard is finally hacked off, the flow of niceties dries up and eventually a feeling of longing for the first follicles of re-growth. They say it is better to have loved and lost – but where beards are concerned, the loss can be simply avoided. With a beard, love and never lose!

6. Food. Beards are a useful source of food. Eating off the beard of a rival (which you may have to do if your rival has read reason two) will give you those much needed calories due to the left over food that can be stored up over a period of time. Either intentionally or not. The smart man with the beard will never go hungry. Whats better than a twelve ounce, juicy, tender, sirloin steak? Finding a twelve ounce, juicy, sirloin steak in your beard two hours later! That’s what.

7. Stroking. Dogs, cats, parrots and, to a lesser extent, crocodiles and tarantulas, all like to be stroked. It is surprising in this age of instant gratification that humans haven’t followed down a similar path to chin tickling heaven. Well children, let me let you in on a little secret, being stroked is great! However, the opportunities for being stroked are considerably limited, but when one arises it is always prudent to be in possession of a long, sleek elegant beard. Then, who knows where the night will take you!

So, gentleman, cast aside your razors and join us in our quest for a simpler, hairier life.

September 17, 2011
7 Reasons The Flying Car Has Issues

Well, we might not be getting our hoverboards anytime soon, but it looks as if the flying car could be on our driveway as soon as next year. This is the Terrafugia Transition®:

Hunktastic, huh? And this is what it looks like when it’s taking you to work:

That’s a slice of heaven right there. The concept is undoubtedly genius. We have all been sat in traffic wishing we could take-off then and there. In reality though, the Terrafugia Transition® poses a number of problems. Seven of them.

1. Branding. We have already had a look at some of the worst product names out there and while the Terrafugia brand probably wouldn’t quite make that list, the name still worries me. ‘Terra’ obviously means ‘ground’, but I think of it just as it sounds. ‘Terror’. Would I get in a Virgin Nightmare? Or a Qantas Shock? Or a British Airways Screamer? Not a bloody chance. So would I get in a Terrafugia? Not a bloody chance. And sadly I am probably not alone. Why didn’t they call themselves Smoothflight or something equally camp, cliched and assuring?

2. Take-off. The take-off speed of this thing is apparently over 100mph. Its max speed on the ground is 62mph. I used to think I was good at maths.

3. Enough Room To Swing A 6-Iron. On the Transition® page of the Terrafugia website it gives you a list of conveniences. There are six and mostly things you’d want to hear. Rear-wheel drive and automated electromechanical folding wing being two. And then we get to the end of the list. And you start reading. And then you read it again. And again. And then you realise you are reading it correctly. You realise it does say, ‘Cargo area holds golf clubs’. Not ‘cargo area holds 50kg’ or ‘cargo area holds eight thousand pairs of pants’, but ‘cargo area holds golf clubs’! Why? Why would you do that? You have just alienated everyone who needs somewhere to put their cricket bat. Or a suitcase.

4. Landing. Maybe, just maybe, there is a reason this aircar has been designed with the discerning golfer in mind. Once you’ve taken off, you need to have somewhere to land. In fairness you could probably have worked that out for yourself, but there’s probably no harm in me helping you out. Where the hell do you land this thing though? You need a fair bit of room. You might get squashed by a 747 at Gatwick and fields might be a bit bumpy. The last thing you need is a scarecrow entering your cockpit. So the obvious alternative therefore are the lush, smooth fairways of a nearby golf-course.

5. Dizzy. There are naughty people around. Naughty people who steal wing mirrors. I don’t think they would need too much convincing to nick a non-mirrored wing. The problem is though, just as you might not notice a missing wing-mirror when you get in the car, you might not notice a missing wing. You’d end up flying around in circles.

6. Time. This is a bit like the Aesop fable, The Tortoise and The Hare. Just a modern version for modern times. The Hare is the plane. It’s clearly quicker. As the crow flies, it would get from A to B in twice or thrice the speed of the car. But only if it was a crow. The problem is that the plane needs to use an airfield to take-off and land (they’re not really allowed to land on Royal St. George’s). Which means first the plane has to be a car to drive from A to an airfield. Then it can do its funky flying bit. Only its funky flying bit will take it to an airfield miles away from B. Then the plane needs to be a car again. Meanwhile the car can be a car and get stuck on the M40, M25 and M23 and still beat the plane (which is now a car) back to B. It kind of defeats the object of having a propeller.

7. Always Take The Weather With You. The manufacturers advise you not to fly if the weather is inclement. I can go down to Poundland (and ask someone to go inside for me) and get a kite for £1. A kite flies beautifully in inclement weather. I would therefore expect a £180,000 aircar to fly 180,000 times more beautifully in inclement weather, not crash to the earth because it got whacked by a hailstone. Unbelievable.

July 25, 2011
Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why Glastonbury Sucks

This week Luke Glassford has taken the 7 Reasons sofa to a field far, far away. Luke is the chief music writer for music news and review site, All-Noise.co.uk and has been to Glastonbury more times than he would ever admit.

Yes people, it’s that time of year again – festival season! When everyone suddenly becomes a super-cool, shades-and-wellies wearing fashionista and likes to prattle on about how much of a ‘proper music’ fan they are. Right in the middle of this hyped-up, giddy season of festivals is Glastonbury – the biggest, oldest and oh-so coolest of all the summer festivals. And here’s 7 reasons why it sucks!

1. Travel. The first ‘festival’ thing you will do is make your way to the festival site. Like going on holiday, this is always the best bit. Except, unlike your holiday, the journey will come to an abrupt end about 50 miles away from your destination because of massive, soul-draining, spirit-crushing tailbacks. And if you think the 7 hours of stop-start traffic on the way there is bad, just wait until you leave on Monday morning – when you’re tired, dirty and in absolutely no mood to be queuing up for hours just to get out the car park!

2. Toilets. Where there’s lots of people, there’s lots of poo. It’s just a fact of life. At festivals, toilets become stinking, disgusting cess pits which make you more aware of everyone else’s bodily functions than ever. This also makes you much more aware of your own bodily functions and you will, at one point, have this conversation with yourself: “Right, I’m front and centre at the Pyramid stage and my favourite bands on in 10 minutes – God I love Glasto. Oh, hold on, do I need a wee? Maybe, but I should be able to hold it. No, I’ve thought about it now, it’ll only get worse. Ill have to go find the toilets. But how am I going to find my way back to this great spot? The queue will be massive too – I’ll probably miss half the gig. Well I can’t hold it for 2 hours now so Ill have to go, lose my friends and lose my great spot to go stand in a toilet queue for an hour. God I hate Glasto!”

3. Camping. Everyone ‘lucky’ enough to be going to Glastonbury needs to ask themselves: “When did I last go camping?” and “Why have I not been since then?” The answers will probably be: “Ages ago” and “Because it was crap”. Now picture that crap camping experience at that picturesque location with the shower block. Now picture an overcrowded field with tents and guide-ropes pointed in a myriad of angles, trapping you in a cess pit of drunken louts and annoying, squealing teenagers – that’s Glastonbury!

4. Weather. Yes we’re British so we have to moan about the weather. But no-one likes rain when they’re trying to enjoy themselves. Eating fast-food and drinking lager is no fun whatsoever when it’s raining. It’s also no fun when it makes a quick trip to The Other Stage a tiring ordeal made all the worse by the fact all you can do when you get there is stand ankle deep in mud and get rained on. And what do you do next? Why, go back to your flooded tent of course!

5. Expense. It’s not only the fact it costs so much. It’s more the rigmarole you go through for the privilege of just getting the chance to pay for a ticket. Filling out a massive, intrusive form will get your foot in the door. Then you have to get a ticket. Sitting in your dressing gown for 4 hours with your laptop on, pressing ‘refresh’ every 10 seconds while hitting redial on your phone. At 9am. On a bloody Sunday!

6. Other People. No matter what fun activity you do in your life, one factor will always ruin it – other people. They get in the way, push in in queues, throw cups of wee all over the audience and generally annoy you.

7. U2. Just when you think Glastonbury couldn’t get any more suckier, they wheel out your mum’s favourite ‘rock’ band for an opening night smug-fest on the Pyramid Stage. There’s not much more to say to justify this point except – if you’re looking forward to seeing U2 then you probably deserve all the horrible, soul-destroying stuff that is going to happen to you over the weekend!

Obviously, this is quite a pessimistic view of Glastonbury and there is fun to be had – so we look forward to a follow-up here on 7reasons.org called something like “7 Reasons Why Glastonbury Rocked!!!” (If you can think of 7 things that is!)

June 25, 2011
Guest Post: 7 (+1) Reasons An Onion Doesn’t Make A Good House Pet

In keeping with our traditions as a a self-help guide we are delighted to welcome Paisley Downing to the 7 Reasons sofa. For those of you wondering who Paisley is, let me tell you. Paisley enjoys writing comical articles about pets, politics, and cyber culture. She currently writes for Allied Satellite TV. It’ll come as no surprise to you then that today’s post is concerned with that troublesome matter of selecting a pet. Here’s Paisley (after the photo of an onion):

Selecting the right pet for your home can be a daunting process and, with so many choices, beginning with which pet not to choose could save you time and stress. Today, we’ll look at seven really good reasons you don’t want an onion for a house pet.

1. An Onion Reeks. An onion will necessarily have a powerful smell after peeling or slicing. While this makes it excellent at what it does, it contributes little to the family aspiring to adopt a new friend. An onion simply can’t stay wrapped in its comfy little peel forever. Sooner or later, the onion will have to come out. By then, the only options left include lighting a candle to ward off the fumes, or submerging the onion in iced water. Neither option is conducive to cuddling on the couch.

2. Too Many Layers. Of all the vegetables one could select as a family pet, the onion is known to be most complicated. Just when you think you’ve developed an easy rapport, whammo! Another shocking, perhaps even disturbing surprise from your thin skinned friend. The onion is simply beyond our comprehension, in a number of ways — and by the time many onion owners discover what that number is, the damage to the relationship has been done and there is no going back.

3. Fragility. Onions are not the hardiest of vegetables. Even when stored in optimal conditions, the best of the lot can quickly go bad, transforming your sleek-sheathed bulb baby into a furry friend. While it is true that the variety used for cooking can be stored for much longer periods of time at room temperature — as opposed to sweet onions that require refrigeration — even these are overly sensitive about being left alone, and prefer the company of other onions to yours.

3. Cost. Many people are initially attracted by the affordability of onions, but they fail to see the Big Picture; onions can cost pet owners more than they might believe in terms of personal relationships and health care. How many times has a young man let an onion come between him and that special girl? Or a guy come home from a tough day on the job, only to face the perils of indigestion after a too-close encounter with an onion during his lunch break?

4. Disloyalty. Unlike broccoli, the onion is likely to be disloyal to its owners should a more exciting person come along. Onions tend to wander off with anyone who will give them a moment’s attention, and if you disappeared never to be seen or heard from again, the onion would not care so long as someone else was there to feed, bathe, and play with it.

5. Jealousy. Let’s face it: onions need lots of attention and can be quite jealous. They’re jealous of you, your children, your pets, and your life. Even the most affectionate onion will eventually disappoint you with passive-aggression tactics such as rolling around in your pillowcase when you aren’t looking, leaving a slime trail on the bathroom floor for you to slip on, or throwing out your mail before you’ve had a chance to read it. If you decide to go onion, be prepared to coddle a delicate, high-maintenance temperament.

6. High Energy Levels. Unless you’re very young and active as a matter of course, you will likely find the onion’s energy levels to be too high. An onion is constantly on the move and loves chasing and being chased. This is not a pet for a person who expects a nice, quiet creature to nod hello to in the mornings and evenings and not have to deal with during the day.

7. They Hate Family Photos. Onions are notorious for their purposeful avoidance of the camera during family get-togethers. In fact, they are known to go so far out of their way to escape picture time that there have been reports of onions rolling away into the wilderness at high rates of speed, where they are unfortunately lost or preyed upon by wild animals. What better way to ruin a family reunion than the needless tragedy of losing a beloved pet in the chaos?

April 9, 2011
7 Reasons Life Would Be So Much Better In Black & White

This post needs no introduction, but I’ll give it one anyway. Colour is rubbish. Right, on with the reasoning.

1. Colour Blindness. Suffering from the disability myself, I know that a world without colour would make things much easier. Especially when it comes to my work as a designer. Never again would a client phone me up and ask why I have decided to turn their red logo a shade of dark green. I then wouldn’t have to apologise and spend hours redoing the poxy thing. Nor would I get a subsequent phone call from the client advising me that they are terminating the contract because I obviously thought it would be funny to send it back brown.

2. Dull Games More Exciting. There was a time that I used to like snooker. I was at school and it proved a more enthralling than doing my homework. These days though I have found my entertainment elsewhere. I like to prod myself in the eye with chopsticks for example. If snooker went back to the good old days when it was played in black and white though, I can imagine being positively horny about the prospect. What colour has he hit?

3. Wardrobe. The reason I have such questionable dress sense is because I just have so many colours to choose from. That’s my excuse anyway. If everything was black or white though I couldn’t possibly go wrong. I could wear black with white. Or black with black. Or white with white. Or, if I was feeling adventurous, I could replicate a pack of dominoes.

4. Embarrassing Clothes. Talking about dress sense, why is there always someone who turns up to the wedding looking like a twat? Either they are wearing pick shoes or a turtle-shell patterned blazer.Black and white would eradicate this problem immediately. And you wouldn’t need to store your photo album in the loft.

5. Sunburn. Another disability I suffer with, the inability to put enough suncream on regularly. Because of this I often find myself getting burnt. Mostly on the face and neck, but I have been known to get burnt somewhere near Maidstone before too. While a black and white world wouldn’t lessen the physically pain, it would certainly reduce the mental anguish. I’d probably have something of a grayscale face which would enable me to blend nicely into an urban world of roads, pavements and lampposts.

6. Cheaper. The reason living is so expensive is due in no small part to likes of cyan, magenta and yellow. Get rid of them I say. Let’s just have black with nothing filling in where one wants white. We’d save a fortune and

7. Decision Making. In a world that is black and white it would only make sense that there are no blured issues. We would automatically know right from wrong. We would know that tea is right. We would know that Janet Street-Porter is wrong. Life would just be so much simpler.

March 2, 2011