7 Reasons

Tag: Tan

  • Guest Post: 7 Reasons You Should Visit Turkey

    Guest Post: 7 Reasons You Should Visit Turkey

    Turkey is enjoying a growing reputation as a favourite tourist destination for people from all over the world. The brochure will tell you that this is because the resorts are first class, the beaches are clean and the cities are fun places to be. All true of course, but why else should you visit Turkey – reasons you will not see in the latest tour company brochure?

    Guest Post: 7 Reasons You Should Visit Turkey

    1.  Buy Some Cheap Tat. Do you have a few birthdays coming up that means you will have to fork out for expensive presents you just know the recipient will only moan about? If yes, head to Turkey. The markets there are huge and full to the brim with exotic presents such as flawless jewellery, the finest carpets and silks. Move swiftly pass these items, though, and pick up some genuinely appalling counterfeit t-shirts from ‘Nikey’ and ‘Addidass’ for about 75 pence each. No one will notice the difference. Probably.

    2.  Smoke A Few Years Off Your Life. Anyone else a bit fed up of the anti-smoking brigade? Even non-smokers sometimes agree that the restrictions placed on smokers are a bit harsh. But if you want to puff away where you want or in a place where it is actually encouraged, head to a Turkish shisha bar. These are a smoker’s paradise and a week spent in these bars should knock a few years off your life. What better way to stick it to the man?

    3.  Burn The Pastiness Away. It is not an exact science, but – on the whole – women love the sight of pasty skin, burnt to a crisp and starting to peel. In order to get this look, it is important to spend a good few weeks in the sun with scant respect for its power. With temperatures reaching the mid-thirties in costal resorts, Turkey Holidays are ideal for perfecting this look. You’ll get a nice, healthy, red glow if nothing else.

    4.  Kebab Heaven. When at home it can be difficult to find an excuse to buy a kebab. The greasy and fat heavy late-night snack is the ultimate accompaniment to beer and is scientifically proven to make you feel 100% better instantly. So where better to visit than the country that invented it? A trip to a kebab house is a genuine cultural experience. Not bad, eh?

    5.  Walk Around In A Fluffy White Robe. You may not be aware, but Turkish baths originated in Turkey. And, what do you think of when imagining public baths? Yes, that’s right. White fluffy robes. Now, you might not actually get a big robe to wear when you visit, but it is worth the trip just to see if you do or not. If you don’t, just chill and generally be a bit lazy.

    6.  Meet Up With Fellow Countrymen. The point of going abroad is to experience life as it is at home. Just in a warmer climate. If this is an approach you take to holidays, you’ll love Turkey. There are more British in Marmaris then there are in Manchester. So it is well worth flying thousands of miles to experience this phenomenon. After all, why integrate with the locals when you could have a beer with Pistol Pete from Bristol?

    7.  Buy A Fez. The Fez, made famous by Tommy Cooper and no one else, is an item of clothing worn on the head, commonly referred to as a hat. Wearing such a garment instantly makes you hilarious and is a truly unique piece of comedy that no one else has ever attempted to recreate when on cheap holidays abroad to Turkey. For added laughs and respect from your fellow travellers, wear the Fez at every opportunity. And that includes the flight home.

    These are just seven reasons to visit Turkey. But there are literally hundreds. If you can think of some more, let us know!

    Written by Ricky Durrance for Beat the Brochure.

  • Guest Post: 7 Reasons I Am Most Probably Half-Greek

    Guest Post: 7 Reasons I Am Most Probably Half-Greek

    We’ve never really mentioned publicly our gratitude those of you who submit guest posts. Mainly because the vast majority of them give writing a bad name. One lady who hops, skips and jumps her way to the other end of the spectrum though, is Things To Do In Manchester supremo, Liz Gregory. Regular 7 Reasons readers will remember with great fondness Liz’s previous posts about dolphin’s embodying the devil and mince pies. So you, like us, will be delighted to see her back on the 7 Reasons sofa today. Though it has to be said she looks like she’s having a bit of an κρίση ταυτότητας. And if that sounds greek to you, that’s because it is. Here’s Liz:

    7 Reasons I Am Most Probably Half-Greek

    Having recently returned to rain-drenched Britain after a week in Kefalonia, I have decided that I am not in fact a pasty-faced Mancunian but indeed something far more exotic. I realise now that I am at least half Greek, and can offer the following evidence to any doubters (including, perhaps reasonably, family members).

    1.  The Weather. In Greece, it is sunny. Always. In fact, I would go so far as to say that the temperatures in Greece are actually just silly. Such heat makes any kind of strenuous activity impossible, and forces one to spend the entire day lying quietly by the pool, drinking cold beer in a frosted glass, and occasionally having a quick frolic in the water to cool off. I found, to my surprise, that I was good – no, make that very good – at doing this; I would even say I was something of a natural.

    2.  My Wardrobe. I essentially wear the same clothes all year round, and am the proud owner of approximately 1,297 pretty much identical little dresses with flowers on them (or sometimes, a daring stripe). Imagine my delight to find that in Greece, such items can actually be worn ON THEIR OWN, without the addition of cardigans, thick tights and leggings (sometimes all at once) – a truly liberating feeling.

    3.  The Tan. For reasons hitherto beyond my comprehension, I have skin that tans exceptionally easily; this is now easily explained by my new-found Greek heritage. I have returned from my holiday a most pleasing colour, which looks all the more striking when cunningly accessorised with an obviously non-Greek husband who appears to have come back paler than when he went.

    4.  The Food – Part One. My favourite crisps in the whole wide world (and I am quite a connoisseur if I do say so myself) are Walkers Sensations. In Greece, these are called Lays Sensations. I like this name better, and am therefore obviously both a/ Greek and b/ the owner of a very mature sense of humour.

    5.  The Food – Part Two. One of the best bits of being on ANY holiday is that you are forced to eat out every night, and are thereby released from the drudgery of trying to think up exciting new ways with the excess of whatever item is dominating the vegetable box this week. Greek food is particularly rewarding, offering meaty goodness at every turn and merrily deep-frying any passing vegetable until all its nutrients are safely neutralised. I am clearly cut out for this kind of diet, as I have come back weighing less than I did before, despite eating a kilo of bread before every meal and consuming three cows and a lamb during the course of my stay.

    6.  The Alcohol. I am not really one for drinking spirits in the UK, preferring to up my 5-a-day fruit and vegetable quota by having wine instead. However, I enjoy both Ouzo and *whispers* Metaxa Brandy, and only a properly Greek person could say that.

    7.  My Promising Fluency In The Greek Language. Obviously, the Greek language does itself no favours by using silly squiggles and shapes instead of proper letters, but despite such obstacles I found myself in full possession of an almost entire vocabulary after just a few days. I can say: hello, good morning, good evening, goodbye, please, cheers, how are you, and very well thank you; what more, frankly, does one need? By the way, all the haters on Twitter who suggested I should learn the useful phrase “more please” were roundly ignored.

    So there you go; incontrovertible proof of my inherent Greek-ness. Now all I have to do is sort the maths out, as I’m fairly sure I’m half Spanish and half Italian as well…

  • Guest Post: 7 Reasons Freckles Are Genius

    Guest Post: 7 Reasons Freckles Are Genius

    It’s Saturday. And you know what that means. Marc and I are allowed up from the sofa to stretch our legs. In our place this week is Claire Quinn. (You can follow her extraordinary life on twitter here). And, in something of an historic moment, she actually is sitting on the 7 Reasons sofa. Well the London half of it anyway. The other half is in York. It could be said that she has freckles. But she doesn’t care. And this is why.

    Woman Freckles
    This Isn't Me. Or Claire.

    1.  Practical Games For The Children. Anything from connect the dots – or join the freckles as it would be in this case – to learning to count can be done with freckles. Assuming they are using your freckles, well, you can have some fun too. Frowning is really going to muck-up their sums.

    2.  Suncream Saver. The more freckles you have, the less suncream you need to use; you only need to apply the lotion in-between said freckles. All the money that you save could be spent on something else. Like gin! :O)

    3.  Spot Cover Up. No one really likes spots – I guess there is a sadistic pleasure in squeezing them – but no one wants them on show. Which is why people cover them up, but with freckles you don’t have to! Ooo so you save money again – make-up purchases are fewer than the average non freckly personage.

    4.  It’s All In The Name. Freckles aren’t just called freckles. They also go by the name of fern tickles. This makes them special. Birth marks don’t have another name. Moles don’t have another name. Spots could be called ‘blemishes’ I suppose, but that’s in no way the same.

    5.  Look Browner. So it might just be from a distance – up close you just look like you’re covered in freckles – but from a distance you do look completely tanned. There is bound to be someone out there who likes the ol’ ‘tanned at a distance, freckle-ly up close’ appearance and if there isn’t please don’t tell me.. because I’m counting on that!

    6.  The Lovers. If you have a lover you can get them to kiss all your freckles. If you have a lot of freckles like me it will mean you will get a lot of attention. If you don’t, ask the cat*.

    7.  A Feature. Most people have something about them they would rather change. Maybe it’s a big nose or big ears or just one big ear or maybe a small ear or maybe nothing ear related at all. Maybe it’s a birthmark right in the middle of their forehead. Or maybe they have ginger hair. If these people were asked what they would swap them for, they would say freckles. No one would swap freckles for one big ear and one small ear would they?

    *Or kitty.