1. Association. Almost everything that you buy from ebay comes with free bubble wrap, and the sight of bubble wrap is mentally associated with the arrival of a new bike part or a jewellery tree or a silver letter opener or a miniature sewing machine or an owl statuette or a giant pen or a Back To The Future novelty clock (yes, our loft is heaving). The sight of bubble wrap means the arrival of stuff. And stuff is good. Especially red stuff.
2. Christmas. I once gave a large, fragile, Christmas present that was covered with a substantial quantity of bubble wrap. Within ten minutes, the gift had been discarded, and the recipient was clothed from head to toe in the bubble wrap, spinning, and shrieking with delight. She was 32. I believe she still has the bubble wrap.
3. It’s Better Than The Alternative (1). Bubble wrap is a far better packing material than polystyrene chips, which are perhaps the most pervasive thing known to man. I don’t know how, but when you remove an item from a box containing polystyrene chips, the quantity of chips in the box remains exactly the same. That’s in the unlikely event that the chips stay in the box, as they usually spill all over the floor and, even though you think you’ve got them all, they subsequently turn up on the floors of every room in the house. Oh, and in the cat. He loves them.
4. It’s Better Than The Alternative (2). When an ebay purchase arrives insulated in bubble wrap it says very little about the sender (other than they chose the correct insulation). When an ebay purchase arrives wrapped in newspaper, it says something quite different. Now I must admit, I’ve had an enjoyable time reading scraps of newspaper from around the world that came with ebay purchases, but I’ve also purchased items that have come wrapped in the Daily Mail. To this day, I still can’t look at our cow-patterned butter dish without thinking, “Fascists sent us that”. Fortunately I don’t go into the loft very often.
5. It’s inspirational. Joey Green and Tim Nyberg got inspired in a bar and wrote the first draft of The Bubble Wrap Book on 827 cocktail napkins. That’s the way to write. That sounds like a crazed, rambling, semi-coherent lost weekend of writing. I’m writing this alone in a room with no napkins, no bubble wrap and no cocktails. I’m wearing lounging pants. I’m doing it wrong. If only I had some bubble wrap. Or a cocktail.
6. Inevitably. Okay, you knew this was coming. You can pop it, which is probably the most satisfying, compelling and pointless activity that a lone person can be involved in (multiple people can have pillow fights). It’s not possible to be near bubble wrap without the thought, “pop it…pop it…pop it…POP IT!!!!!!!” echoing insistently through your mind. The compulsion to pop it is irresistible.
7. It’s ubiquitous. Bubble wrap gets everywhere. And thanks to the very clever OpalCat, it’s here and we can prove reason six. Enjoy! Manic mode is amazing, by the way.
<!– http://www.virtual-bubblewrap.com –>