Tag: changing rooms

Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why It’s Good To Shop With Your Other Half!

She sees it as the ultimate cardio work out. He sees it as the ultimate test of endurance. It could mean only one thing… couples shopping!

Take a look around any town centre in the UK and you’ll see a familiar sight – women, the hunters of fabulous clothes; men, the carriers of bags and the heroes that help their ladies shoulder barge through the hoards of bargain hunters.

But while women are the Queens of the high street, it’s men who reign supreme on the internet. In this Infographic ‘Men Vs Woman – Battle of Spending Habits’, from financial solutions company Baines & Ernst, men actually come out on top as the biggest spenders, with alcohol, vehicles and gambling appearing in their top 5 purchases.

Men spend on average a total of £3,495 online every year and 15% more than women on their credit cards, making them the surprise cash flashers.

Although guys prefer the comfort of shopping from their armchair, there are certain benefits to being a co-pilot on a shopping trip…

Here are 7 reasons why it’s good to go shopping with your other half…

1. You earn excellent boyfriend brownie points! This is the only reason you really need to go shopping. Want a night out with your mates? Don’t want to be relegated to the other room to watch Match of the Day? Want an all night Xbox marathon with the boys? Well, you earned it buddy!

2. It’ll make your lady happy. A shopping wing-man is always good. And if you’re there to hang out with, tell her she looks good and treat her to lunch, your lady will be happy. And by doing all of this you’ll get… excellent boyfriend brownie points! *see point above for boyfriend rewards.

3. Pretty good way to while away the hours. If you’ve got nothing planned, then a trip to the shops can be a good excuse to check out the things you want to see and treat yourself to a few well deserved treats. Many big shopping centres also double up as entertainment complexes now, so if you get bored of wandering around the shops, you could go and have a really nice meal in one of the restaurants or catch a film.

4. Coming up to a special occasion? Use the time to plant seeds! Whether you’ve got an anniversary, birthday or Christmas coming up, you can use this time to look for what you want and plant some seeds. And it’ll give you the chance to check out what she’d like too.

5. You get regular sitting intervals. They’re in the changing room – you get to sit. Shops seem to have all designed dressing rooms with the gent in mind – creating little social areas for abandoned boyfriends so that you don’t get funny looks for loitering around outside changing rooms.

6. You get the gift of time. When you’ve been relegated to the boyfriend bench in the changing rooms, you can use this time to catch up on your phone admin. So you can message your mates, answer emails, check out Facebook, read the news and anything else you like without being asked “Who are you messaging?”

7. Its mutual ground. Okay, it might not be your most favourite activity, but it’s a good mutual ground for you to spend some time together and have a bit of fun. Grab a coffee, people watch and do some browsing. It could be worse!

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January 28, 2013
Guest Post: 7 Reasons To Have A Home Gym Instead Of A Membership

Are you tired of your blood pressure going through the roof every time you step foot into your gym due to the smorgasbord of annoyances on display? There’s something to ruin the day of any appetite. Why not avoid ever having to return there by creating your own gym at home? As if you needed them, here’s seven reasons.

1. The Smell. If you’re walking into a room filled with 50 other sweaty individuals in the various stages of a workout its unlikely that it’s going to smell like you’re visiting the body shop. Unfortunately this is an occupational hazard that is associated with the gym, and unless you want to hover around every machine spraying the seat cushions with Fabreeze you might have to grin and bear it. If you set up your own gym at home at least you can bang in the old Glade Plug in Fresh and work out until your heart’s content. If you get Lavender and Vanilla you can even shut your eyes and imagine that you’re working out in a sun basked meadow.

2. The Changing Rooms. Where to start with the changing rooms? The over familiar fellow gym members strolling around the room, determined to get that last bit of water from their ear with the corner of their towel? The bags hiding just out of sight, peeking out from under a bench and only making themselves known when they cause you to trip over, sending your Lynx Africa skidding across the floor in the process? The guys who seem to just like hanging out in their, bro-ing it up with all the other bros. Bro. At least in the comfort of your own home you can have a shower and get changed without feeling like you’re living in a mixture of Top Gun and a Butlin’s Strongest Man competition.

3. Equipment Hogs. There’s nothing wrong with someone getting full use of a piece of equipment. It’s their right. They pay membership fees just like anyone else. It’s when someone feels the need to simultaneously work three pieces of equipment at once, and then have the temerity to stare you down when you ask if they need that extra dumbbell that it can try your patience a little bit. If you have your own gym at home you’re unlikely to run into this predicament.

4. Grunting. Every gym has at least one. A grunter. Lifting weights doesn’t mean that you have to attempt to suck every litre of oxygen out of the room and then scream like Maria Sharapova fighting a Silverback Gorilla. Unless it’s you that is doing the grunting. In which case you should probably stop. I’m not sure people like it.

5. Sweaty Equipment. There is nothing more irritating than getting onto a machine only to discover that it is literally dripping in sweat. Guys, I’m looking at you for this one. No disrespect, but I’ve yet to see a woman leave a piece of equipment that looks as though it’s been used as a prop in the Flashdance chair scene. This won’t be an issue if you have your own gym at home. And if you don’t wipe your equipment down after you’ve used it at least you’ll only get drenched in your own sweat. Everyone like’s their own brand anyway. Don’t they?

6. The People Who Stare. Of the many gym personalities that you are likely to encounter, this one will put you on edge the most. Lurking around the equipment, watching you workout and perspiring more themselves than you ever could. As soon as you make eye contact with them they will slink away or pretend that they have been sent a text. It’s only upon closer inspection that you realise that they are trying to read a text message from their iPod. They NEVER seem to actually work out either. When you’re working out at home they are unlikely to be there. And even if they are you can just close the blinds.

7. Hoverers. You know the ones. You’ve been on a machine for a matter of seconds and they are hovering around it, shooting you ‘hurry up I’ve got to get back to the office’ looks. Too ‘polite’ to actually ask you how long you’re going to be, but not so concerned about time that won’t move onto another machine. You can’t even grab a drink of water because they will steal your machine on account of them being serial grave jumpers. Known to loudly chat on their phones about how they’re ‘stuck at the gym’. The annoyance that they cause is reason enough to take out a second mortgage so that you can afford your own gym. They will obviously be refused membership.

This post was written by Richard Hughes on behalf of the home fitness equipment distributor Orbus Leisure.

July 3, 2012
7 Reasons To Do Away With Curtains

1. Full Disclosure. All manner of weird and shameful things happen behind curtains: Line dancing; Nazism; geriatric transvestism; the viewing of ITV; this. All of those things are probably occurring on your street right now. If we did away with curtains we’d be forced to behave ourselves, which would be no bad thing.

2. Changing Rooms. Curtains in the changing rooms of clothes shops are a bad idea. It’s an oft quoted statistic that every year four people die in the UK while putting their trousers on. I haven’t died while dressing, but I’ve had a couple of trouser-hopping incidents myself – at home, fortunately. If this hasn’t happened to you, here’s how it works: You’re putting your trousers on, usually you’ve got one leg in, they’re at ankle height and you’re about to put your second leg in when you overbalance and start to fall sideways. Once you start falling sideways with one leg in your trousers, self preservation kicks-in and you instinctively hop in the direction that you are falling, to arrest your fall. But you are so overbalanced – and instinct keeps you hopping – that the only thing that will stop your sideways progress is a solid object (there’s no chance that you can stop by yourself). But curtains are not solid. This means that if a trouser-hopping incident occurred in a changing room, you might find yourself hopping right out of it. Who knows where you could end up? The changing room opposite? The men’s jeans section? Boots? Wherever you ended up, you’d probably feel a bit foolish. Perhaps people would point.

3. It’s Curtains. In films, you often hear the phrase “It’s curtains for you”. This is bad. Curtains = Death. Death = Bad ∴ Bad = Curtains*.

4. The World. In the opening monologue of Shakespeare’s As You Like It, Jaques declares that, “All the world’s a stage…”. If this is true, then according to the Home Office Manual of Safety Requirements in Theatres and Other Places of Public Entertainment (1934), all the world requires a curtain. An enormous curtain would block out the sun and would be prohibitively expensive. Not to mention difficult to wash.

5. The Kitchen. I don’t understand why people have curtains in their kitchens. They appear to be utterly without purpose, like the frosted glass windows in aeroplane toilets or the bins in Scarborough. I wonder if there’s something I’m missing. It’s the wrong room for sex. Are people being more secretive about family recipes than I am? What are they doing in there?**

6. Venetian Blinds. There’s a better technology available for obscuring windows; Venetian blinds. They’re more technologically advanced. They don’t require washing. They block out the light more effectively. Okay, so you can get your head stuck in them but, minor indignities aside, they’re so much better than curtains.

7. The Dream. I used to have a recurring dream when I lived in a shared house. In the dream I would walk downstairs in the morning and open the dining room curtains (the dining room overlooked the enclosed back garden). When I opened the curtains I would see, standing there motionless, staring straight back at me, Pierluigi Collina. Then I would wake up, usually in a cold sweat. I haven’t lived in a house with curtains since. It looked pretty much like this, in case you were wondering.

*Maths = A doddle.

** Do you have kitchen curtains? Do you get up to stuff behind them? Please let us know what you do via the comments section (anonymously if necessary).

April 23, 2010
7 Reasons That Golf Is The Wrong Sport For Businessmen

Businessmen play a lot of golf, and business golf is a accepted part of business culture – there are even books about it. Here are 7 reasons that golf is the wrong sport for businessmen.

1. Location. Business takes place in the city – an urban environment – but golf takes place in the suburbs or in rural environs. Therefore, golf is in the wrong place. As a businessman, this means you have to travel to the golf course. What you need is a sport that you can play in cities, thus saving travel-time and expense. Snooker or pool would be ideal. After all, things always go better with a drink and you’ll have a big table that you can put your paperwork on.

2. Stuff. Golf requires an astonishing amount of equipment. There’s all manner of paraphernalia to lug around – so much of it, in fact, that you need to carry an enormous golf-bag, or hire a man to carry it for you. Some people even use electric buggies (a whole special car to convey golf equipment!). This is clearly ridiculous. Carrying your golf equipment around is incompatible with being businesslike. What you need is sports equipment that fits into a briefcase. A Frisbee is perfect.

3. Assessment If you compete against potential business partners over a few holes of golf, what are you really learning about them? That they don’t like to get their pink trousers muddy? That they can chat about very little while waiting to tee off? A more challenging sport will teach you far more about them. Rugby union, for example. You’ll learn far more about your potential business partner’s drive, desire, sense of ethics and commitment when he’s growling, biting your ear and trying to remove your testicles with his hand or when he’s spear-tackling your head of marketing. Rugby union is a team game. There’s no “I” in rugby union. Well, there is, but someone will poke it out sooner or later.

4. Clothes. Golf requires you to physically exert yourself. Golf also requires a different set of clothes than business. This means that you have to shower and change once your round of golf has finished. This is inefficient use of time. This is time you could spend working and earning money. Unless, that is, you earn your money in the men’s changing rooms, in which case…er…er…do carry on.

5. Women. You don’t see women heading out to the golf course to “network” or play “business golf”; they usually prefer to conduct their business at their business premises, and it’s quite hard to fault that sort of logic. If you’re playing business golf, you’re doing business very inefficiently – as you’re only meeting men. You need to be in an environment that’s agreeable to both sexes. I don’t know what that place is, but there must be at least one, even if it is always at the wrong temperature.

6. Length. Golf takes too long. It takes you out of the office for hours. If you must use the company’s time to participate in sport, you could find one that takes less time. 100 metre sprinting is a quick sport. Here’s how to combine it successfully with business: Walk to a point that’s 100 metres away from your desk, then run back to your desk as fast as you can; because that’s where you should be – at your desk – getting work done.

7. Displacement. Is your work really so dull and frustrating that you need to go to a field and repeatedly smack a ball with a stick? Aren’t you just avoiding work when you’re playing golf? If you didn’t hang around on the golf course “working”, then your actual working day would be so much shorter and you could spend your free time doing what you really want to do. Spending more time with your family or…er…playing golf.

March 31, 2010