7 Reasons

Tag: Camping

  • Guest Post: 7 Reasons To Never Go Camping In Australia

    Guest Post: 7 Reasons To Never Go Camping In Australia

    Surprisingly (to me) it seems camping is one of the most popular ways for tourists around England and the world to stay down under. While many might argue the way you choose to holiday is purely personal preference, this article explains why choosing hotels over camping for your Australian trip is the right preference to have.

    7 Reasons To Never Go Camping In Australia

    1. You sleep on the floor. “That was the best sleep I’ve ever had!” said someone on a camping trip, never. Sure, slumming it in your Mickey Mouse sleeping bag in your friends’ living room was cool when you were a kid, but can we really trust the memory of someone who had just graduated from eating worms and tying their shoelaces? Even for more advanced campers who come equipped with air mattresses or fold out stretchers; you know what’s easier than that? Pre-made hotel beds with amazingly crisp fresh sheets!

    2.  Communal showers. Need I say more? I suppose if you prefer neighbouring shower buddies, whose shampoo water creeps under the wall onto your side, and a long walk back to your campsite where your feet get dirtier than they were before it isn’t so bad. And for those people really going all out and camping in the outback, I hope you don’t expect to hug your loved ones when you return home.

    3.  No nice surprises left on your pillow. And if there is, it’s probably not ‘nice’ and it’s probably not advisable to touch it.

    4.  Not necessarily cheaper. A big reason people choose to spend hours pitching tents and waking up with sore backs is because they think they will save money. A word of caution for those who have never experienced the Australian outback before; it’s not just your expensive bedding, tent, cooking utensils and equipment and extensive toiletries that you will need. Make sure you pack bug spray, sunblock, first aid supplies for preliminary application to spider and snake bites, a suitable hat, boots and weather gear, amongst other items. Alternatively, hotels do have a fool proof way to combat all of these things; walls. And they are usually* included in the cost of your bill!

    5.  Not necessarily more eco-friendly. It’s the justification many make as they drive their stakes into the earth and dig a hole deemed their bathroom for the week. OK, so maybe skipping on a few days of electricity and running water will do the environment some good, but most modern accommodation is fairly aware and active in reducing their carbon foot. Between recycling bins and electricity-activated key cards, you’ll still get that feel-good kick without having to sleep in the wild.

    6.  It’s not ‘Australian’. Contrary to popular belief, camping down under is not the “Aussie” way to visit. You know who invented that myth? Australians. So they could laugh at tourists from their comfortable air-conditioned hotel rooms. It’s up there with lies such as “everyone rides around on kangaroos” – sorry if that ruined it for anyone. It’s a little known secret, but you can actually do all the best touristy things the biggest island in the world has to offer, and have a comfortable sleep every night.

    7.  You have friends and family who love you very much. They don’t want to see you suffer. And if they do, they’ll send you on a camping trip.

    *Always

    Written by Melinda Jennings on behalf of Punthill.

     

  • Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why Glastonbury Sucks

    Guest Post: 7 Reasons Why Glastonbury Sucks

    This week Luke Glassford has taken the 7 Reasons sofa to a field far, far away. Luke is the chief music writer for music news and review site, All-Noise.co.uk and has been to Glastonbury more times than he would ever admit.

    7 Reasons Why Glastonbury Sucks

    Yes people, it’s that time of year again – festival season! When everyone suddenly becomes a super-cool, shades-and-wellies wearing fashionista and likes to prattle on about how much of a ‘proper music’ fan they are. Right in the middle of this hyped-up, giddy season of festivals is Glastonbury – the biggest, oldest and oh-so coolest of all the summer festivals. And here’s 7 reasons why it sucks!

    1.  Travel. The first ‘festival’ thing you will do is make your way to the festival site. Like going on holiday, this is always the best bit. Except, unlike your holiday, the journey will come to an abrupt end about 50 miles away from your destination because of massive, soul-draining, spirit-crushing tailbacks. And if you think the 7 hours of stop-start traffic on the way there is bad, just wait until you leave on Monday morning – when you’re tired, dirty and in absolutely no mood to be queuing up for hours just to get out the car park!

    2.  Toilets. Where there’s lots of people, there’s lots of poo. It’s just a fact of life. At festivals, toilets become stinking, disgusting cess pits which make you more aware of everyone else’s bodily functions than ever. This also makes you much more aware of your own bodily functions and you will, at one point, have this conversation with yourself: “Right, I’m front and centre at the Pyramid stage and my favourite bands on in 10 minutes – God I love Glasto. Oh, hold on, do I need a wee? Maybe, but I should be able to hold it. No, I’ve thought about it now, it’ll only get worse. Ill have to go find the toilets. But how am I going to find my way back to this great spot? The queue will be massive too – I’ll probably miss half the gig. Well I can’t hold it for 2 hours now so Ill have to go, lose my friends and lose my great spot to go stand in a toilet queue for an hour. God I hate Glasto!”

    3.  Camping. Everyone ‘lucky’ enough to be going to Glastonbury needs to ask themselves: “When did I last go camping?” and “Why have I not been since then?” The answers will probably be: “Ages ago” and “Because it was crap”. Now picture that crap camping experience at that picturesque location with the shower block. Now picture an overcrowded field with tents and guide-ropes pointed in a myriad of angles, trapping you in a cess pit of drunken louts and annoying, squealing teenagers – that’s Glastonbury!

    4.  Weather. Yes we’re British so we have to moan about the weather. But no-one likes rain when they’re trying to enjoy themselves. Eating fast-food and drinking lager is no fun whatsoever when it’s raining. It’s also no fun when it makes a quick trip to The Other Stage a tiring ordeal made all the worse by the fact all you can do when you get there is stand ankle deep in mud and get rained on. And what do you do next? Why, go back to your flooded tent of course!

    5.  Expense. It’s not only the fact it costs so much. It’s more the rigmarole you go through for the privilege of just getting the chance to pay for a ticket. Filling out a massive, intrusive form will get your foot in the door. Then you have to get a ticket. Sitting in your dressing gown for 4 hours with your laptop on, pressing ‘refresh’ every 10 seconds while hitting redial on your phone. At 9am. On a bloody Sunday!

    6.  Other People. No matter what fun activity you do in your life, one factor will always ruin it – other people. They get in the way, push in in queues, throw cups of wee all over the audience and generally annoy you.

    7.  U2. Just when you think Glastonbury couldn’t get any more suckier, they wheel out your mum’s favourite ‘rock’ band for an opening night smug-fest on the Pyramid Stage. There’s not much more to say to justify this point except – if you’re looking forward to seeing U2 then you probably deserve all the horrible, soul-destroying stuff that is going to happen to you over the weekend!

    Obviously, this is quite a pessimistic view of Glastonbury and there is fun to be had – so we look forward to a follow-up here on 7reasons.org called something like “7 Reasons Why Glastonbury Rocked!!!” (If you can think of 7 things that is!)

  • 7 Reasons The Weekend Just Gone Could Have Been Better

    7 Reasons The Weekend Just Gone Could Have Been Better

    Providing you are doing this properly, you will be reading this on Monday morning. And providing you are doing this properly, I will be in the car returning from V Festival. Which is why I am writing this on Thursday afternoon. And as I am writing, I am quietly confident that I am not going to get stuck in a portaloo during a hurricane. But this is naive. I almost certainly will have done. And I will also have experienced a further seven disasters.

    Muddy Boots

    1. Wellington Boots. They are new. Green and new. At least they were. No doubt I am now wearing someone else’s boots. I almost certainly left them outside of the tent on Saturday night only for the V Festival swap-shop parade to pass through my patch of field at 4am and decide I could do with an older pair. A pair with holes in. And talking about holes, my…

    2.  …Inflatable Mattress will contain at least one by now. Don’t ask me how I did it. I probably sat on it wrong or decided to try and deflate it with a plastic fork. As a result, I probably didn’t sleep very well and decided that I would be better off getting up ridiculously early and visit the…

    3.  …Portaloos. Which, while not a complete disaster, was a bit like playing a game of Russian Roulette. And, because I have a habit of shooting myself in the foot, I will almost certainly have ended up walking in to the portaloo which contained the man wearing nothing more than a…

    4.  …Mankini. Thankfully, I don’t hang around long enough to get one of my own and before you know it I am running back to my tent. Which is of course now my…

    5.  …Lost Tent. Having forgotten to bring my compass with me, I am left to navigate via the sun. Which of course blinds me and so I spend half the time picking myself up after tripping over approximately 33 guy ropes. I am now covered in mud, beer, thai chicken curry and maybe have the odd syringe protruding from an arm. I head for the…

    6.  …Showers. They were cold. Very cold. So cold in fact that I get accused of being in the wrong sex’s showers. Probably by the mankini seller. By the time I make it back to the correct tent, the…

    7.  …Queues for breakfast are already heading out of Chelmsford. I suppose I should have just been using the gas stove, but I broke that on Friday morning while packing the car. Along with next door’s cat.