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Russian Roulette Sunday: Celebrity Exclusive

Posted on November 14, 2010 in Russian Roulette Sunday | 0 comments

At 7 Reasons we’ve never brought you exclusive celebrity news before, but now we have some.  A letter has been erroneously delivered to one of us (the York based one) with exciting details about the private life of an icon of both the large and the small screen.

We don’t know why Bairstow Eves sent this letter to us, as it’s addressed to homeowners in Clifton, York, where neither of the 7 Reasons team live, but we’re jolly glad they did.  Here it is:

A letter from Bairstow Eves with important news about Mr T.

Dear Home Owner,

We urgently require more properties to sell in Clifton for the following clients who are registered with our office.
  • Mr T is a first time buyer looking for a property with a minimum of two bedrooms.  He will consider any style of house.
  • Mr & Mrs H have their property on the market and are looking to purchase a two bedroom house in Clifton.
  • Mrs H is looking for a semi or detached property with a minimum of four bedrooms.
I would stress that this is a genuine and urgent enquiry; we only take this time and effort for serious potential purchasers.  Please contact our Sales Team on 01904 622 355 to arrange your free, no obligation Market Appraisal.
Assuring you of our best attention at all times.
Yours Faithfully,
Office Manager – Bairstow Eves York.

That’s right, 7 Reasons readers!  This man.  Mr T is looking to buy a house in York!

The A-Team's B.A. Baracus (Mr T) winking and pointing
I pity the fool that sells me a home in the wrong area!

Now we don’t know why the star of the A-Team and Rocky III is looking to buy a property here.  It seems unlikely that it’s going to be a second home for holidaying as the letter also reveals that (surprisingly) Mr T is a first time buyer.  And it tells us that he will consider any style of house; though presumably he’ll want one with a garage full of odds and ends that he can spontaneously fashion into an armoured car or use to construct an impromptu gun turret.

The letter goes on to tell us that Mr and Mrs H (we don’t know who these people are, they’re not important celebrities like Mr T) are looking to purchase a two bedroom house in Clifton.  But wait!  Mrs H is also looking to buy a semi or detached property with a minimum of four bedrooms.  We don’t know why.  Perhaps she’s a brazen strumpet who’s looking for somewhere to house her army of lovers?  We just don’t know.   We do feel that Mr H should be worried, but mostly we’re excited about Mr T.*

Thank you, Bairstow Eves, for bringing this important celebrity news to our attention.  7 Reasons (.org) will return tomorrow with reasons (unless there is any more Mr T news).

*I have an A-Team duvet cover that needs signing.

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