7 Reasons Tintin Is Better Than Asterix
1. Appearance. Tintin – despite his abnormally spherical head – looks like a proper human being. He takes pride in his appearance. He wears blue sweaters and beige coats and spreads a little Brylcreem in his hair. Asterix, though, is a bit of a scruff. He has an exceedingly large nose and a bushy yellow moustache. He also never changes his clothes unless he’s having a dip in the Roman Baths. And why has his helmet got feathers sticking out of the top? Not one to be taken seriously.
2. Names. Asterix is surrounded by people whose names are supposed to be funny. Fulliautomatix, Unhygenix and Bacteria for example. These aren’t funny. They are just baffling. And when you first pick up an Asterix comic book aged seven, very confusing. Tintin, on the other hand, is good friends with Captain Haddock. Simple. Funny. Effective.
3. Fighting. While it’s occasionally fun to see Asterix and Obelix bash a load of Romans up and collect their helmets, it gets a little boring when it happens every other page. Which is why it’s good that Tintin has never felt a need to collect Roman Soldier’s helmets. Instead of bashing up a few baddies, Tintin prefers a little espionage. Hiding behind lampposts and impersonating scientists and wearing kilts. Far more exciting.
4. Magic Potions. Asterix is a short little fella and so would have struggled to destroy entire Roman Battalions without a sup of magic potion. Tintin, though, could bring down evil conglomerates while sipping a soda and doing The Belgian Times’ crossword. Upside down.
5. Superstitions. Asterix was silly. Well, actually, all the Gauls were silly. They believed that the sky would one day fall on their heads. And in one particular adventure, the Donald Trump of Gaulville – Vitalstatistix – thought it had. Then he realised he just had his pyjama top over his eyes. Tintin didn’t have any silly superstitions like that. Probably because he was well read. He also sleeps naked.
6. The Dogs. Both Tintin and Asterix have a dog that follows them around on their travels. Tintin’s dog is called Snowy. Snowy is forever taking part in the missions. Always on hand to save Tintin’s life. He’s a great addition to the stories. Asterix’s dog, Dogmatix, actually isn’t his dog at all. It’s Obelix’s. And he’s not very good. Instead of snapping at Julius Ceasar’s heels, Dogmatix’s main job is to get all jealous when Obelix falls in love with a girl. That’s just odd.
7. Default. Tintin was created by a Belgian. Asterix by a Frenchman. Need I say more.
And the main reason for preferring Tintin is that he somehow reminds you of someone…
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