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7 Reasons The French Couldn’t Invade The UK

7 Reasons The French Couldn’t Invade The UK

1.  Language. A successful French invasion would result in the British speaking French. That’s not happening. The British have about as much interest in learning French as they do in my trousers. They are also incapable of learning something so… well… pointless. (The British I mean, not my trousers. Though, come to think of it, my trousers are fairly incapable in that department too). The fact is, we Brits just wouldn’t...

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7 Reasons To Invade France

7 Reasons To Invade France

1.  Riots. There is nothing the French like more than a riot. Half the time it doesn’t have to be about anything particular, they just like getting out there and giving it a go. They haven’t had one for a while so let’s give them something to riot about. I suspect, us invading – and the French Army waving us through – will work. 2.  Language. French is just very silly. What is it with everything having to be masculine or...

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