tumblr site counter

7 Reasons TV Adverts Annoy Us

7 Reasons TV Adverts Annoy Us

1.  Interruptions.  Let’s start with the obvious. Ads interrupt programmes. And just when you are getting into them as well. Now you have to wait five minutes to see if the bloke is dead or not. Then you find out he isn’t and curse the show for being unrealistic. He shot him in the head for goodness sake. 2. Voiceovers. That famous bloke is doing the voiceover for a financial advert. You just can’t place the voice. You...

Read More

7 Reasons David Slew Goliath (On Points)

7 Reasons David Slew Goliath (On Points)

1. Dizziness. Valuev spent the whole fight looking down at the top of Haye’s head. Haye had cleverly styled his hair with cornrows. Basically Valuez was looking at lines all night. Lines make you dizzy. Eventually it caught up with him and he wobbled all over the place in the final round. 2. Testosterone. Valuev’s levels were off the scale. This is proven by the fact that he had shaved his back before the start of the fight but by...

Read More

7 Reasons To Leave The Party

7 Reasons To Leave The Party

1. Your crocodile costume has made several people laugh and has got you a lot of attention, but it turns out that you’re not at a fancy dress party. 2. It turns out that the man you took an instant dislike to earlier because he was “an unctuous pillock…wandering about like he owns the place” is your host and does, in fact, own the place. 3. The attractive young lady that you’ve been eyeing up all night and are using your wittiest...

Read More

7 Reasons That Coffee is Better Than Tea

7 Reasons That Coffee is Better Than Tea

1.  Coffee doesn’t taste of tea. 2.  Tea doesn’t come with nearly enough paraphernalia.  A pot and a little sieve thing?  Bags?  Coffee comes with roasters, grinders, steamers, frothers, espresso makers and brewers; They’re all enormously expensive and very, very shiny.  Brilliant! 3.  You don’t have to stick your little finger out when drinking coffee which, on the evidence of this picture, is a very good thing...

Read More

7 Reasons A Child Should Never Be Given The Guinness Book Of World Records

7 Reasons A Child Should Never Be Given The Guinness Book Of World Records

1.  It’s a book. There is nothing worse than receiving a book when you are a child. Especially when the book contains stupid facts about the smallest puddle and the biggest conker found in Newcastle-upon-Tyne. 2.  The child will have to look happy. They will be suppressing their true feelings. Feelings of anger and pain. They are basically lying to themselves and everyone else. Their future is now one of self-harm or joining MI5. 3....

Read More
Page 5 of 6« First...23456