7 Reasons To Love Monday
1. It’s a fresh start. It is to the week what New Years Day is to the year. Full of hope, expectation and Great Aunties singing Auld Lang Syne.
2. Sunday was so quiet without the letterbox flicking open. Now it’s Monday and the post is arriving again. Who knows what will arrive. Unless you are in the UK. In which case everyone knows what will arrive. Sod all.
3. It’s not a day for work. Monday is spent talking about the weekend. Did Donna and Darren get it on? Did Donna and Jimmy get it on? Did Donna and Matthew get it on? Was Donna particularly horny this weekend?
4. You have the rest of the week to make it happen, so you can relax and take it easy. You can check twitter every ten minutes. You can make paper aeroplanes. You chuck paper clips at each other. You can go and find Donna.
5. The Monday sports pages are the best of the week. Full of reports and analysis. And that column from that bloke who used to play, but apparently doesn’t know anything about the game. He really is a twat isn’t he?
6. The Boomtown Rats hated Monday. Bob Geldof is almost as annoying as Bono. Every reason to disagree with him then.
7. There are a whole five nights ahead before X Factor is on again and half the nation loses the plot for a few hours. The other, more sophisticated half, go to the pub and make really long straws.
You agree right?